Last week an organization called One Million Moms called for the boycott of JC Penney because they hired Ellen DeGeneres as their new spokesperson. Apparently all those moms think that Ellen is too gay and will ooze her gayness all over JC Penney's merchandise, infecting little children with gay after seeing her gay face and her gay family and gay gay gay. Ugh. Come on moms, even Bill O'Reilly knows this is dumb.
One Million Moms is the same group that got mad at Macy's because there was a tiny picture of a cake with two grooms in one of their catalogues. The same group that opposes Modern Family because it portrays a gay couple or a modern family - see how they did that? And I'm assuming they'll have a lot to say about today's awesome ruling that Prop 8 is unconstitutional in California. (Hint: they wont like it!) These moms are obsessed with gays! But even if there are one million of these moms (their Facebook page only has 40,000 likes - that's 960,000 short) that means that about 100,000 of their kids are likely gay! So instead of trying to force all the gays back in the closet, these moms could be spending their time on much more important issues.
Seriously, I can think of a million things that are more important, but that would take too long and we all just want to be watching videos of Billy Eichner at the Super Bowl. So here are just a couple of issues that are more pressing than gay people shilling for department stores. Add your own!
Hoboken wont let Snooki and JWoww film there.
Classy ladies Snooki and JWoww of the Jersey Shore are filming a spin off show and the city of Hoboken, NJ said no thanks! Is it fair that these women be banned from living their lives in whatever city they want? Shouldn't the One Million Moms defend their right to fall down drunk, scream obsenities, and generally embarrass their future children? Where are Snooki and JWoww's moms on this pressing issue??
JFK Intern Affair Details Just Coming Now
America's hottest former President, John F Kennedy, had an affair with an intern. Surprised? No. But, the details are only coming out now! When Clinton was doing the no-no with Monika Lewinsky we heard all the nasty details right down to seeing the dress with the goo right away! Kennedy's virgin intern took her time to spill the beans. Come on, moms! Don't we deserve to know these things sooner?
Demi Moore Was Doing Whippets
This is clearly a mom issue because Demi Moore is a mom. And she is frankly too old to be doing whippets. And too rich. Moms, wont you find a suitable drug for a celebrity mom to use when going through personal struggles in her life?
This is a Thing (NSFW)
So...this exists. A fake vagina that you attach to your ipad and have sex with. It seems to me, this would be an issue for moms.
Karl Lagerfeld Called Adele Fat
Fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld said he likes Adele's voice, but she is too fat. Moms! We have to stick up for our curvy women. This is why our daughters have eating disorders. Moms, where are you on this issue of weird looking designers calling beautiful singers names??
Rihanna is Hanging out with Chris Brown
Proud idiot and woman beater Chris Brown has charmed his way back into Rihanna's life. Moms, shouldn't Rihanna hate Chris as much as the rest of us still do?
Queen Elizabeth's 60 Year Anniversary as Queen
Queen Elizabeth's queen anniversary!! Did you get her a gift?? Moms! You are supposed to be on top of that!
No Muppets at the Oscars
Children everywhere love the muppets! Why is Hollywood so anti-muppet? Moms! Figure this one out!
Has Everyone Heard of Smash?
Even though NBC runs a promo for their new series SMASH every three seconds, has EVERYONE heard of it?? This is the most pressing issue for NBC since Friends salary negotiations. Moms, can you make sure everyone knows about this show?
JC Penney Isn't Cool...Yet
Isn't JC Penney a cheaper Macy's, a better Kmart, but a lame Target? Moms, you've actually given JC Penney some street cred. They are defending Ellen DeGeneres even though 15 years ago they were one of many advertisers to stop airing commercials during Ellen's sitcom when her character came out of the closet. Moms, seems you're 15 years late with your bigotry.
- no way is 1 in 10 gay...no way
- love this.
- One Million Moms also prevented me from getting Schweddy Balls ice cream... :-(
- i won't even start on this. one million moms, well, my mom is smarter than you.
- Apparently all those moms think that Ellen is too gay and will ooze her gayness all over JC Penney's merchandise, infecting little children with gay after seeing her gay face and her gay family and gay gay gay. Ugh. Come on moms, even Bill O'Reilly knows this is dumb. Why do you call her GAY when she is a lesbian ? LESBIAN LESBIAN LESBIAN !! YEP, I SAID IT...Political correctness is out of control. So all those moms should just mind their own business ? How about all you racists mind your own business too, if you didnt vote for Obama you are a raciest...yep, I'm one of them too cause I didnt vote for him....And if you have an opinion different from mine you are wrong and cant have a say or join in with other people with an opinion different from mine and have a say together cause then you will become a political party and then I will call you a bigot, a racist, a this, a that....have mercy people, do you actually think yours is the only opinion that counts ?
- Queers & Lesbians.....Queer is an umbrella term for sexual minorities that are not heterosexual, heteronormative, or gender-binary. In the context of Western identity politics the term also acts as a label setting queer-identifying people apart from discourse, ideologies, and lifestyles that typify mainstream LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transsexual) communities as being oppressive or assimilationist. This term is controversial because it was reappropriated only two decades ago from its use as an anti-gay epithet. Furthermore, some LGBT people disapprove of using queer as a catch-all because they consider it offensive, derisive or self-deprecating given its continuous use as a form of hate speech. Other LGBT people may avoid queer because they associate it with political radicalism, or simply because they perceive it as the faddish slang of a "younger generation."
- This article is about the sexual orientation. For other uses, see Lesbian (disambiguation). Page semi-protected Photo of two women standing, viewed from the back from the shoulders down, dressed in outdoor clothing, carrying motorcycle helmets, and holding hands The word lesbian can refer to a woman's identity, to desire, or to activity between women. Here, two women hold hands and engage in shared leisure activity. Lesbian is a term most widely used in the English language to describe sexual and romantic desire between females. The word may be used as a noun, to refer to women who identify themselves or who are characterized by others as having the primary attribute of female homosexuality, or as an adjective, to describe characteristics of an object or activity related to female same-sex desire. Lesbian as a concept, used to differentiate women with a shared sexual orientation, is a 20th-century construct. Throughout history, women have not had the freedom or independence to pursue homosexual relationships as men have, but neither have they met the harsh punishment in some societies as homosexual men. Instead, lesbian relationships have often been regarded as harmless and incomparable to heterosexual ones unless the participants attempted to assert privileges traditionally enjoyed by men. As a result, little in history has been documented to give an accurate description of how female homosexuality has been expressed. When early sexologists in the late 19th century began to categorize and describe homosexual behavior, hampered by a lack of knowledge about lesbianism or women's sexuality, they distinguished lesbians as women who did not adhere to female gender roles and designated them mentally ill.
- I'm pretty convinced that one million moms is actually like four dudes in some mom's basement.
- cook staley do you realize ellen called herself "Gay"? your comments are just ridiculous...no one asked for a definition or a history lesson of the word lesbian
- I guarantee you, the instant something shiny that Mommy's Precious Precious Treasure wants goes on sale exclusively at JCP, mommy's values will suddenly take a backseat.
- Sounds like One Million Moms needs to be more concerned with math skills. 40k < 1 million. I'd like to also see them concerned with spaying and neutering pets, and to stop breeders, puppy mills and pet stores from selling dogs. And one last thing just off the top of my head, Dear One Million Moms, your efforts would be better appreciated if you told people to stop wearing crocs. Those things gotta go.
- Premise was good, execution lame. Ellen DeGeneres' show sucked, gay or not. 1 in 10 is an old myth, like Beethoven, probably closer to 3-4% but I'll buy the continuum thing though the distribution is probably more skewed towards straight than bell shaped.
- The "One Million Moms" should really get a life!!!!
- I briefly looked at their site, and it's the typical homophobic crap that's been dying out in this country for years. We need to remind these trolls that they are irrelevant. Most of us did not raise our kids to be bigots. I'm not a huge Ellen fan, but I will shop at J. C. Penney this Sunday.
- These hateful moms should be more worried about why I can't find Count Chocula all year round and have to wait till Halloween for Target to carry it. This seems way more important than JC Penny backing Ellen....WAY MORE IMPORTANT.
- omg @ the Ip*ssy!!! *my eyes my eyes*
- One Million Other things the One million MoMs it's nice , love it .
- One million moms are just 40,000 some-odd old ladies who are bored. Plus, they hate that they can't do fun stuff. They're mostly jaded.
- How about they worry about their kids and the anti-bullying issue? Oh wait - they are showing their kids how to be a bully... I get it now lol
- One Million Moms satire blog: http://onemillionmom.blogspot.com/
- Ellen is one of the BEST SHOWS to come on the telli. She is so generous and so funny that I look forward to watching her every day. I record her show on my Direct T.V. so I can watch her whenever I want. She is a beautiful person and loves to help peopel who are less fortunate then most of us watching. I am happy that she is in love with her wife and that she brings smiles to all of us everyday!