Full Credits

Stats & Data

September 20, 2012

  1. When you’re driving by yourself and see a pretty girl walking you honk the horn, slow down and yell, “Hey good looking, I’ll be back to pick you up later!"
  1. When your kid’s friends talk about their ski trip you chime in with, “Yeah, those double black diamonds can be a little tricky.”
  1. After returning home from a party where friends politely clapped during your karaoke performance you frantically scour the internet for information on the next American Idol auditions.
  1. You inquire about open-mic night at your local comedy club after your Aunt, who currently resides in a “county facility”, laughs heartily at all your one-liners.
  1. You’re seriously considering purchasing the tightest pair of Wrangler jeans that are anatomically possible.

  1. You’re seriously considering driving to a mall two hours away from your home and cruising the mall in your new Wrangler jeans.
  1. You tell people that there’s no doubt in your mind that you could have played division-3 basketball but you chose the “academic” route.
  1. When the new girl at the local coffee shop consistently puts excess whipping cream on your latte you say to yourself, “Still got it.”
  1. When you’re at the mall with your new Wranglers you go up to at least five separate sales girls and say, “Hey little filly!”
  1. You ask to borrow your neighbor’s life-size Barbie doll for a “CPR” demonstration class.