You move in to kiss your lovely date, but chicken out at the last second causing the guitar player on stage to fade from existence(turns out, he was your future son). Horrified at this sight, the teenagers stampede for the exits and kill the school mascot, a goat named Mr. Chompers.
During your homecoming king acceptance speech, you realize that someone, as a prank, replaced the index cards in your pocket with three chapters of The Diary of Anne Frank and youâre too nervous to stop reading.
The mean girls confront the newly attractive, formerly nerdy girl, Jessica about her meteoric rise up the social ladder. Jessica begins to cry and Rod, the captain of the football team, asks what right anyone has to judge how people live and insist that we all work to be better people. This causes people to momentarily forget about the Kodiak bear on the loose, which seizes the opportunity to attack the Pep Squad.
Due to the economic downturn, the dance is forced to share a room with the open casket funeral of local banker, Robert Mansker.
The thick gym walls prevent you from getting a strong 3G signal, thereby prohibiting you from checking Twitter to determine if the dance is fun.