7 Facts About Fidel Castro's New 1,000-page Memoir

By Ryan Ferris February 7, 2012 | 291 Views
Move over, Twilight. Fidel Castro just released his 1,000-page memoir. I plan to hollow out my copy and use it to hide my Cuban cigars.

 

  1. The title is Fidel: Rolling in the Deep.

  2. In true dictator fashion, he wrote it in all-caps.

  3. The New York Times says it’s a “great beach read.”

  4. In one part, Castro reveals he can’t stand the Cuban sandwich, saying: “Ham AND roasted pork? Really?  Why not stuff the snout in there, too, while you’re at it? No siree bob — I’m a cheesesteak man.”

  5. The memoir itself is only 300 pages. The other 700 pages are filled with the message “DIE, IMPERIALIST PIGS!”

  6. It’s dedicated to Snooki.

  7. In a chapter titled “Cuban Missile Crisis,” Castro relates a hilarious anecdote about the time he was having sex with his wife and couldn’t get an erection.
Credits Details
JokePoet
Uploader

Funny or Die Exclusives

Bailout Rejected: Please Help the Rich from Funny Or Die
Added
Bailout Rejected: Please Help the Rich
Bathroommates featuring Martin Starr from The Midnight Show, Josh Fadem, and Martin Starr
Added
Bathroommates featuring Martin Starr
Children's Theater Critic with Alfred Molina from Alfred Molina, Alex Fernie, Funny Or Die, melcowan, rachelgoldenberg, Matt Newell, and Ellie del Campo
Added
Children's Theater Critic with Alfred Molina
Break-up Stories with the Cast of Forgetting Sarah Marshall from Funny Or Die, Jason Segel, Bill Hader, Russell Brand, Judd Apatow, and Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Added
Break-up Stories with the Cast of Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Ask Will Anything: Radio City Music Hall from ComedyTour, Adam "Ghost Panther" McKay, Andrea Savage, and Will Ferrell
Added
Ask Will Anything: Radio City Music Hall
Used Used Car Lot starring Paul F. Tompkins from The Midnight Show, Paul F Tompkins, Michael Busch, MikeRotman, and CaleHartmann
Added
Used Used Car Lot starring Paul F. Tompkins
Parks and Recreation is the Wu-Tang of Comedy from questlove, Amy Poehler, Rashida Jones, Aziz Ansari, and Funny Or Die
Added
Parks and Recreation is the Wu-Tang of Comedy
Livin' 'Neath the law with Jack McBrayer: Episode 2 from Jack McBrayer, Drew Antzis, and Funny Or Die
Added
Livin' 'Neath the law with Jack McBrayer: Episode 2
     
    • Content-footer