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October 10, 2010
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A Fool at Forty is a Fool Forever

I want to know why it is that someone gets until the age of 40 to grow up and be mature. As you may guess, this saying means that if one hasn't "grown up" by 40, they never will. As far as males are concerned, I'm pretty sure that if a guy doesn't know what's up by like 28, I'm over it.

A Penny For Your Thoughts

No one person should ever, EVER say this to me. Because if I take you up on this, you're fucked.

Bee's Knees

A personal favorite of mine, simply because it's just so cute, but completely ridiculous. Who the eff came up with this?

Belly Up

If things go "belly up," then they go badly wrong. But here's my question: When you're floating dead in the water - a dead man's float, if you will - isn't that usually Belly Down? Just askin'

Birds and the Bees

What do these two species have to do with sex? I'm seriously asking.

Bite Off More Than You Can Chew

Never happened to me ... NEXT...

Opening Up a Can of Worms

You know those prank cans of fake snakes? When you open it up, all the snakes come jumping out at you? THAT'S opening up a can of worms. Did that come before or after the saying? Because if it came after, I get it. If it came before, I don't -- I mean, since when are worms canned? WHAT'S THE POINT of this idiom???

Cut Off Your Nose to Spite Your Face

REALLY? I mean, really, really? This is the stupidest saying of them all. I understand the concept of it, but it sounds completely unpleasant and I think that something else should be reinstated instead.

Dead As A Doornail

Now, I've been referred to this in bed (yea, right!) But seriously, dead as a doornail would suggest that you're just lifeless. But a doornail really has some serious purpose in life and so this just doesn't hold any water. (Ugh, yet another dumb saying)

Sleeping Like a Baby

When you say you slept like a baby, presumably that means you slept amazingly throughout the night. Now, riddle me this: When was the last time a baby slept through the night? Those things are up like every 2 hours, bless their little hearts. 
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