If you never knew just how self-referential Franks and Beans could get, just watch the dramatic reenactment of our very first episode in this tale of new beginnings, this springtime flower that is episode 25, "The Long Run". In addition to sounding like a mix between a Bob Hope road movie and an Ernest Hemingway novel, this episode asks some underlying questions that "High School" left tantalizingly unanswered. Or perhaps you never asked those questions and find my assumptions unbecoming. Either way, dammit, I've got a story to tell, and I'm going to tell it.
"The Long Run" obviously has its origins in the beginning of the series; in many ways Larry and I saw this as a symbolic nod in the direction of everything that our self-proclaimed first season had become. As the first episode in our second season (why we chose this as our relaunching point is anyone's guess), this episode is more than just an extended version of "High School's" signature opening scene, but it still serves as a reminder of what came before.
Thinking back to the show's first few days, I can remember just what I had planned for the series. The first episode, complete with character development and an easy-to-follow storyline, would be followed by a second in which the main plot - trying to get back into high school in order to reclaim some long-lost glory - would be furthered by new jokes and an expanding cast. I had plans to film in the actual high school of record (the one we drove to and quickly from in the first episode), and even a lengthy joke where Larry would point out how my ever-encroaching hair loss would make it difficult for me to pass as the average student ("I'll wear a hat!" would have been my well planned reply).
As it turned out, putting together something of that magnitude would have been next to impossible to accomplish. If nothing else, two guys in their mid-to-late twenties walking around a high school with a video camera was sure to arouse some suspicion. And beyond that, this plan might have netted us - what, five episodes? A half dozen if we were lucky? No, the evolution of Franks and Beans into what it is now was quick and necessary. We do have recurring characters and plotlines, but by and large, the show is propelled by the "joke of the week" mentality.
"The Long Run", in some subversive way, is the expression of that mentality in relation to the show's original intentions. Here I am, running with an apparent goal in mind, determined to accomplish whatever I've set out to do, when all of a sudden I get flattened by a car. This IS the evolution of Franks and Beans. Do you get it?! Is it funny?! I hope so.
Other than being a representation of the show in general, "The Long Run" discusses some other questions that I've had since the first episode aired roughly fourteen months ago. In "High School", much of the opening sequence is simply my character running as fast as he could. I think you could look at this in one of two ways - either what I had to tell Larry was so important that I couldn't stop for anything, or this is how I arrived every time I decided to visit. The second option is, I think, the funnier of the two in a physical sort of way, and as such I had plans of mentioning my character's exhaustive sprints in every few episodes - showing me running up the driveway or bursting in the door or what have you. Would I have had an important announcement or a new impossible challenge with every entrance? It's possible, but as with anything, the possibilities were limited. So if nothing else, this episode again begs the question, "why does he run like that?!" Not answering it in episode 25 makes it all the better, I think.
Another connection I wanted to make, at least at first, was the importance of my message in relation to the distance I traveled. I ran for about ten seconds in the first episode with news that I thought would be life changing. What kind of message would I have if I then extended my journey by as much as I did? I wanted to raise expectations - the longer I ran the more pressing the question would be. And then it ends with a solution that is not at all satisfying, but at the same time the only one possible. An ending as abrupt as my apparent death hopefully had the desired effect: unexpected surprise. I wanted the episode to be all buildup and just a tiny bit of solution, which hopefully it was.
As the shots in the episode progressed, we see a number of different occurrences that might have the propensity to slip on by: the dog that decided to chase me the entire length of its property; the reality shot where Larry chugs on after me down the road; the many times I regretted eating right before I decided to undertake this; the similarity of the last few shots with the opening of "High School"; Larry's masterful editing job in making all of the scenes match up even though some were filmed at different times of day.
If you're wondering why we never actually see me getting hit by Larry in his Jeep, it's because that faking something like that is HARD! When it came down to it, out biggest obstacle was the slant of the road, followed closely by the fact that concrete is hard and my body is covered almost entirely by soft pink flesh. My momentum would carry me downhill to the point where it would be almost impossible to stop myself, let alone fall backwards at the rate the Jeep was traveling. If we had more time (all of our episodes are filmed on a relatively tight schedule), I would have extended the running even more until we came to a more level piece of ground. Even so, the solution to our problems was probably the most effective way to end the episode - cut it just a little short and leave the obvious to the imagination. That way the physical restrictions don't have a chance to overshadow the joke.
I understand that "The Long Run" isn't going to be the episode that puts Franks and Beans on the map, but it was satisfying from a creator's standpoint, if nothing else. It tied our first season in with our ongoing second, and it brought back some more of the absurdities from our much-beloved pilot episode. Why does Jeff do all of that running in "High School"? Well, now we'll never know. Because he's dead.
I hope that everyone is enjoying our current run of season two episodes. We're currently showing new ones on Mondays, and next up is "Public Service Announcement". Or at least that's what I'm calling it in my head. Larry may have something different in mind, in which case we'll fist fight until one of us is left standing. Depending on which title is chosen, you'll know who won. That's how we solve problems here at F&B central. With violence.
See you then!
- Jeff M.
As the saying goes, even a broken clock is right twice a day. If Franks and Beans is the broken clock in this allegory, then the unabashedly sensational episode 24, “Studio Audience” is 5:33 on that hunk of glass and gears. It’s not a perfect metaphor.
Even so, it’s hard to deny that what we have here before us is something special, an occurrence of lightning in a bottle that we hope to perform more often than the image might conjure up (again with the metaphors!). Simply put, both Larry and I are extremely proud of what we accomplished with this little episode that could.
This episode is in many ways a culmination of our entire body of work, but at the same time, it represents the randomness that is the calling card of this series in a way that people who watch this show have hopefully come to expect. While much of “Studio Audience” is a callback to several of our previous episodes, its origins are much less referential – very simply, I thought it would be fun to film a “mockumentary” where Larry and I would be speaking directly to the audience, but in a way that would be different from other episodes like “Commentary” and “Mail Bag/Bloopers”. The result is an episode that is actually pretty similar in format to a number of reality shows that are on the air today.
After watching this episode, you might have been tempted to fold your arms and say “hmm! Looks like Jeff and Larry did some research for this one.” And you would be right, anonymous viewer – we each watched roughly twelve seconds of clips from “The Office” And “Little People, Big World” just to figure out if we should be looking directly at the camera in our ‘confessional’ shots. As it turns out – and as a result of our tireless research – no, looking right at the camera is a major faux pas. Instead, as is evidenced in the finished product, when filming a reality show you must look just SLIGHTLY to one side of the camera. Thank you, Internets!
“Studio Audience” welcomes back friend to the program ‘Hardcore Mark’ as he reprises his role as ‘whatever we ask him to do’. This is an invaluable role, as it turns out that Larry and I cannot play every single character in the show, although we do a bang-up job at trying. While dozens (and dozens!) of people actually watch Franks and Beans, Mark is probably the show’s biggest fan outside of its creators, and thus gets all the good character roles that might otherwise go to waste. He’s quick to critique a new episode with gusto and commitment that is, quite frankly, a little disturbing given the show’s nearly invisible status on the pop culture radar.
The plot of this episode is fairly simple, though the execution was lengthy and detailed: Franks and Beans takes on a studio audience (Mark), which quickly divides the two main characters in their levels of appreciation for it. Conflict is a hallmark of quite a few episodes, but it’s usually less focused and more a result of one particular insult or perceived slight. In this episode (longer than the standard fare at nearly five minutes) we do our best to draw the tension out and show a relatively long progression to the ultimate rift that takes place at the end.
Interlaced with confessionals are clips from mostly fake episodes of Franks and Beans, the exception being a revisiting of “The Sweater”. I had to make this call back, I felt, for a few reasons. First, nudity is most always funny, and Mark’s chase scene really sells it here. Second, “The Sweater” is probably one of the episodes that I have the most problems with (it’s better as a concept than in reality, I think), and reopening this wound whenever possible adds to the humor. No one gets “Commentary” and I’m not the biggest fan of “The Sweater”, so let’s talk about them as much as we can! This is how I think.
The other fake episode clips, the “20-car pileup” scene, the “Can we still be friends?” scene and the “Mixing Bowl” scene were just based on props or one liners and I have no idea what the rest of these snippets would produce…but I have to admit, I did become quite fond of that bowl and wire whisk.
The scene in this episode that stole the show, though, was undoubtedly the confrontation scene, where all that buildup finally leads to something. The walk-and-talk took a few times to perfect, and the whole scene is one entire shot, so this took some doing – one mistake and the whole thing had to be shot again. We practiced slapping Mark’s fake script a few different ways, and once I swiped them straight into Mark’s face, hitting the poor guy right in his eyeball. I feel bad for him now (sorry, Patch), but at the time I was thinking, “that was perfect! Don’t lose character!!”
The ending of this episode was left a bit ambiguous for a few reasons. Most importantly, there didn’t need to be some methodical resolution scene…or at least I wouldn’t know how to make one that was also funny. Secondly, Larry and I decided to make this the official end of Franks and Beans, season one. I know, I know…I said the same thing after episode 13, but still! This time it’s for real. What does that mean in the big scheme of things? Well, it depends on how big you’re thinking. If we’re talking about life or death struggles, surviving against all odds, then it probably doesn’t mean much. But if you’re right at the level of “I’d be somewhat interested in collecting all of these episodes in a handy playback format”, then you’re in luck! Because a DVD is in the works. I know this because I bought like 25 empty DVD cases and we have to fill them with something.
So, if you want one…it’ll probably be free. Because selling it would just go against our moral codes…and no one would buy it. Maybe Mark.
Before filming the “No!” ending for this episode, Larry and I had some decisions to make. Trying to come up with a different way to enter a room and shout one word after two dozen episodes is something of a creative strain, and there was real discussion on moving on to another theme with this next ‘season’. Ultimately, though, I thought that the challenge was worth it, and I could at least go another 24 episodes of unique endings. So if we completely run out of ideas after, oh, episodes 30 or so, it’s on me.
As it was, we had the idea for me to switch roles with Larry for quite some time, but it seemed like this was the perfect opportunity to go with it. It’s very simplistic but it represented something of a benchmark for the show and for Larry and me personally. Franks and Beans has become a great source of pride and enjoyment for me, and I’d wager that Larry feels the same way; so reaching this point in the show brings with it a certain sense of accomplishment. I’d say that we couldn’t have done it without fans and viewers alike, but in reality, this is something I’d like to do even if no one were watching, if we hadn’t gotten a steady stream of encouragement from the get go. I think that this is the measure of any show – commitment in the face of little to no recognition from the outside world – and dammit, we’ve got that in spades with Franks and Beans.
We’re two episodes into our vaunted season two right now, and we’ve been there for a month or so. But the old Franks and Beans machine is getting ready to roll again, and there will be new episodes out before you know it. So keep an ear to the ground! We’ll be back soon. See you then!
- Jeff M.
Our monstrously spectacular 23rd episode, “eBay”, harkens back to a previous episode, but it is its format that brings me to this equally monstrously spectacular blog. I suppose the monstrous spectacular-ity may vary depending on your preferences, though…just take my word for it.
If you’ve seen the episode “Message Board”, then you’ve probably figured out that there are more than a few similarities between it and “eBay”. For starters, my character spends most of his time discovering a new and potentially dangerous function for the Internet. In addition, in both episodes I eventually get caught up in some of the more obvious pitfalls of said Internet tools, as Larry tries to warn me of the errors I’m committing.
I think that this episode, much like episode 11, can be and is still funny even though the two are quite similar because of how common the situations are. Everyone who has haplessly wandered onto a message board can understand how overly dramatic a seemingly harmless situation can become, just as anyone worth his or her virtual salt has seen firsthand how an Internet auction can get out of control. Bidding wars are nothing new, as I’m sure face-to-face auctions hold the same dangerous tendencies where some get caught up in the moment (I once outbid my high school science teacher on a box of random Star Trek paraphernalia…really), but the vendettas that spring out of an eBay auction are at the same time horrible and hilarious. The shared experience with the creators and viewers is what makes this episode work, which hopefully it does.
What really strikes me as interesting about this episode, though, is the format and how it compares to the standard episode of Franks and Beans. “eBay”, clocking in at a little under five minutes in length, is one of our longer episodes. However, it was one of the quickest to shoot, and I think that Larry will agree that it was one of the easiest to edit, as we basically have a steady-camera shot of a few difference scenes that were filmed in basic sequential order.
The speed in which the episode was completed happened for a couple reasons – first, Larry and I were wrapping up a day in which we had spent a lot of time filming for other episodes, and I was anxious to leave (but not because I don’t like Larry. Why do people keep insinuating that?!). Second, and more important, we didn’t use much of a hard-and-fast script. Not that we usually spend our time memorizing written lines, but in this case we really just dove head first into the episode relying on a lot of improvisation. And just like in “Message Board”, it seemed to go off without a hitch.
Once the final product was up and ready for viewing, I noticed the length and it struck me as, for lack of a better term, odd. As anyone who pulls up the F&B playlist (thousands and thousands of you) can readily see, the average length of our episodes might be, what, two minutes? Two and a half? And this is with more preparation, more writing, and more filming than this episode, usually by a lot. What makes it so hard for me to write four minutes of dialogue, when Larry and I can randomly rattle off as much if not more without breaking much of a sweat? This is something that I can’t wrap myself around quite yet – all the preparation that goes into a ‘regular’ episode (and there is preparation…I promise) and we come up with something twice as long by just turning the camera on and going with it. Naturally, a longer episode doesn’t necessarily mean a better episode…but I think you know what I mean.
This also leads me to think about more ‘conventional’ sitcoms, the 22-minute, broadcast-ready television sitcoms. “eBay” is, roughly, one-fifth the length of your average CBS sitcom when you discount commercials. If this one conversation about how easy it is to get sucked into spending too much money on eBay took up 20 percent of, say, as episode of “How I Met Your Mother” (or any other in that generic lineup), how does anything get done in your typical program? How do they not run out of time after the third scene? I can’t figure this one out – it took us four and a half minutes to tell ONE JOKE – and they’re expected to turn out complex characters and interesting situations in not all that much more time. Amazing.
A few more random notes about this episode before I wrap things up for this blog: At the beginning of the episode I make a call to a fictional toy shop (there aren’t many around anymore, to be honest) and ask for a “Rhinox” action figure. This is because I will do anything in my power to talk about the show “Beast Wars” with Larry, as it’s one thing we can agree on – “Beast Wars” was a great show. Tremendous. And Rhinox was the best character on the Transformers spin-off, though Larry may not agree with that. But I’m right. As we were filming, I actually did type “Rhinox” into eBay’s search function, and what do you know – there was a new Rhinox figure on the market. A few weeks later Larry bought it and mailed it to me – because that’s just the kind of guy he is. The kind of guy who mails stuff to you. Thanks, buddy!
One of the most frustratingly deceptive actions on eBay is the scheme of charging too much on shipping costs. Hey, there’s something I want and it’s ONLY 99 CENTS! YES! I WILL BUY IT AND – oh, wait, it costs 30 dollars to send a book…through MEDIA MAIL. You only have to let your guard down for one second and bam! They get you. I hate people who do this.
Our much anticipated “NO!” ending was, honestly, a thing of desperation. For the life of me, I couldn’t think of a good twist on our little tradition, and let’s face it – Larry wasn’t coming up with any pieces of gold either. Finally I said, “oh, just put your clothes on backwards or something” and we went with it. Just before we shot the dubious scene, though, Larry said, probably as an aside, “do you want me to walk in backwards when I do it?” BRILLIANCE! This is what made the ending. I was just going to have Larry walk in as always, only with his pants on backwards (shirt and hat, too, but “pants” is a funny word and I didn’t want to take away from that). And it would have been awful. But having Larry walk in backwards, stick his arms behind him and give ‘em that Larryesque shake did wonders for it and for our ending.
Well, that’s that. “The Long Run” just got posted, so go watch that. NOW! A new episode shows up Monday…I think it’s a keeper, too. See you then!
- Jeff M.
To this effect, we find episode 22, “The Sweater”. Although we come to the conclusion in a much different manner, the joke remains relatively the same – at some point in this episode, there will be people who are not wearing pants.
In truth, there aren’t many similarities between the two episodes in question, but there really doesn’t need to be to have the comparisons made. Look, we’re talking about simulated nudity here, the rest practically writes itself, right? Well, not exactly, but the point is a valid one.
Our scene dawns with what I believe to be the first appearance of my beloved Toyota Camry as a prop in Franks and Beans. I don’t know if “beloved” is the right term to use here, but Larry loves his Jeep so much that I feel obligated to have feelings toward my primary mode of transportation. I’m honestly just glad that the side with the missing hubcap is out of view, as it really brings out the auto negligence that many would probably otherwise accuse me with. At any rate, when my car eventually breaks (possibly in half), I can look back at this episode and feel comforted that it has at least been captured for posterity in some corner of the Internet.
As we needed a driveway and we needed to have Larry do something other than aimlessly stand for this scene, the basketball hoop, sad and neglected at the Franks household, served a purpose and became a small joke in and of itself. No one has ever looked at me and said “I’d be afraid to play basketball with that guy”, unless I had a gun or other weapon on me at the time, in which case the fear would be justified. Larry at least has an edge in height, though neither of us are what you might describe as “skilled”, “competent”, or even “having a better than 50 percent chance of beating young girls at a game where the hoop is twice as wide”. When Larry throws the ball over the backboard as I watch to see where it lands (it did actually travel pretty far), the underlying humor is that a game between the two of us would probably be pretty similar: I’d just stand there and Larry would throw the ball all over the place.
The main focus of this episode – the unsightly sweater – came to me as I was packing to return home for my Christmas break. As I rifled through the possibilities of what I could wear for church on Christmas Eve, it came to me: what is appropriate one day out of the year is inappropriate in every other instance. Think about it. The sweater I have on in this episode (some of the detail of which is lost because it’s white and the sun is particularly bright) is a fluffy nightmare, and even though I’ve never been one to care much about fashion, I’d never think of wearing it outside of the house except for the stately once-a-year Christmas Eve church service. So here we are – 364 days out of the year, people would look at me like I was from another planet if I wore that thing, but on the day before Christmas, no one would bat an eye. It’s the incongruity of it all that I find funny.
The idea with this episode was to make it more and more ridiculous before finally revealing it to be a dream, which, hopefully came as a surprise without making everyone first write the entire thing off as too confusing. This is why we get the applesauce comment and the no pants gag, culminating with the wonderful effect of Larry flying out of the scene. This was one of the most difficult stunts to pull off simply because reversing film is usually so obvious that any humor is lost in the attempt. The idea behind it is easy to grasp – we’re just taking Larry jumping into the scene and playing it backwards. Quite often, though, it looks cheap and dumb, just like speeding up a scene (which the Munsters made famous or infamous, depending on the overuse) has the same effect. I think, though, that we were able to do a pretty good job with this one, maybe because the only line of dialogue is “Wheeeee!” I’d like to point out, though, that I was staring almost directly into the sun for most of this shot. At then end of our various takes, I was seeing spots and my eyes were watering, but the end product is probably better than I originally hoped for.
This all leads up to the end of the episode, of course, where we’re dealing with not only the sight gag of a pantsless Larry, but the culmination of most of the visual lead up from the earlier dream sequence. If this episode succeeded in its goals, there were a few things to take in at the end, and the buildup toward the shock of seeing my character’s nightmare become reality was that much more rewarding. Plus, I just love jokes that end with uncomfortable stares and the line “…what?” Seriously, much of the stuff I write ends with that. I should probably try to be less of a one-trick-pony. Whatever.
Our “No!” ending might be one of my favorites, and not just because I’m in it (although…). Around this time I gave thought to putting an end to this style of ending, but then this one came from out of the blue, with really no preparation or forethought. If we can come up with endings of this stature, we might as well keep them going until they really fall apart. The physical humor of getting hit by a door, I think, is obvious.
I’ve got some catching up to do with these blogs. Dammit! I know! But the good news is that means we’ve got plenty of new episodes coming down the pipe, and as I write this, we’ve still got a few more in the can before we take our next well-deserved break. Even if we didn’t deserve it, we’d be taking it.
See you Monday!
- Jeff M.
Now that Christmas has come and gone for 2008, it’s time to self-assess. It’s time to think over the past year and assign meaning to it. As I create my own personal top 10 countdown list (so popular these days!), I find that Franks and Beans, for me, falls under the category of “too fun to stop doing even if everyone would hate it.” And so it is with great pride that I saw with a bellowing voice, “Eat it, world! Franks and Beans is here to stay
“Essence of Jeff”, our 21st episode that just happens to sounds like it could possibly be the title of a soft-core pornographic movie, definitely covers some familiar territory. Even when factoring in that all of our episodes hold at least some similarities in thematic events, this most current offering still probably ranks on top of that particular list. This isn’t to say that there’s anything wrong with “Essence of Jeff”, or that it’s at all unimaginative (I’ll leave that for others to decide), but if nothing else, there’s a familiarity to it that probably makes it hard to find many distinguishing characteristics.
Let’s start at the beginning. We open with a shot of fried eggs in a skillet, one of my favorite euphemisms for breasts. It seems that any time we highlight food in an episode, which is fairly often, we have a really tight extreme close up of it. Specifically “Grapes” and “Mustache” come to mind. There are a couple of reasons why this is, though it probably comes back to the fact that I have a strange sense of what constitutes a creative camera shot, because I do enjoy a good, detailed close up…and our camera’s electronic capabilities lend itself to just that (even if it doesn’t always show up in the finished online product).
Another reason is for continuity, that warm, comfortable feeling you get when watching a show and the same thing happens over and over again. It’s like a friend – predictable, assuring, and non-judgmental! Or…at least predictable, depending on your friends of choice. I find myself falling back more and more into some of the patterns we’ve established before, and I like those subtle nods to what has come before. I don’t think it takes anything away from the actual joke, and it might itself become part of the joke after the pattern has been adequately established.
So…eggs. If you’re quick to notice, we’re showing one solitary egg in our opening shot. The next shot isn’t as accessible to viewers, but if you’re really observant (and can make use of that handy “pause” tool), you’ll see that Larry is in fact later cooking two eggs when I go ahead and throw the concoction into the mix. This was strictly an editing decision, because for whatever reason, I completely botched filming the second egg dropping into the pan. There was no real excuse for it – I was filming the shell, the pan, the crack, and then…nothing. Maybe the stove behind the pan. Why is this? I can think of two reasons, and the more serious involves a brain tumor that distracts me and my concentration abilities from time to time, so I’m hoping that I just slipped up this time around.
The subsequent conversation plays on many familiar themes that have become a staple on Franks and Beans: my harebrained ideas, Larry’s curmudgeonly mentoring, an ultimate failure on my part. The episode that most springs to mind is the first, “High School”, which probably ended with a funnier outcome, in all honesty. This one hinged mostly on my ability to make pathetic crying noises, which can really only go so far. But the conversation at the beginning, with Larry’s “skin-scraping” comment and my “herbs and spices” line, is one of my favorite and at the very least serves as a pretty good setup for the clash to come.
The crying that you hear as I run out of the room and Larry reluctantly follows, now that I think about it, shares some of its influence with Julia Sweeney and any number of Adam Sandler movies. In this particular scene it’s extended in the editing stage by Larry – so that’s why it seems I’m wailing on for such a long period.
Why I chose the chewing gum/sock reference is really anyone’s guess. I do think “chewing gum” in a nasally whine is a little funny, and the sock leads to the initial confusion, but why exactly I put that in the episode is not exactly clear. Is it funny? It has the potential to, at least. Whether or not it delivers is up to others to debate, but the fact is that it’s not the primary focus of the episode – the punch line of sorts in “Essence of Jeff” comes from the running away and crying. The second time it happens, it’s a matter of repetition and predictability; we’ve calmed Jeff down, we’ve taken control of the situation one more time, and then it happens all over again. That inability to keep control of an extreme situation is what makes or breaks this joke and, by extension, this episode.
Our “NO!” ending is one of my favorites, at least in theory. The idea of Larry falling down only to reappear with blood streaming down his face is not only visually distinctive but also pretty damn funny, in my opinion. The problem with the execution is that I wasn’t allowed to break Larry’s nose to finish the effect – not even a little. The question then became what could be an acceptable substitute, and I originally settled on ketchup. In addition to being disgusting to have smeared all over your face (Larry assured me that he could still smell it lingering in his nasal cavities hours after washing it off), ketchup isn’t as red as it might appear in the bottle or your memory. In fact, it comes off a little orange on film, or at least on our film, and that would do little more than confuse anyone watching – and this is beyond the initial confusion of what the endings mean in the first place.
We kept the ketchup, for its liquid consistency, on Larry’s hands for the final shot, and ended up using some Halloween costume makeup for the blood on Larry’s face (and thus the Joker costume played a new role in the show). The results, as I’m sure is obvious, are so-so. I’ve learned that it is challenging to show realistic-looking blood on film, meaning that I may have to scrap a future episode where one of us kills the other on screen, only to be sprayed in the face with blood from the stab wounds. Well, maybe we’ll just have to go through with it for real. Save the date on that one!
In about, oh, eight hours as of the time I’m writing this, I’m set to film more Franks and Beans. So don’t worry, loyal viewers…there’s much more to come. See you then!
- Jeff M.
This should come as no surprise to the vast number of you who follow this show on a regular basis, but as our magical 20th episode “The Slip” proves, Franks and Beans continues to hang precipitously on the forefront of new technological advances on the Funny or Die website.
You may have noticed the upgrade in aspect ratio over the last few weeks – most evident in the black bars on the sides of most videos that shamelessly plug the very website you’re visiting. That’s because Funny or Die now broadcasts in widescreen, and Franks and Beans was the first to usher in this new change with the debut of “The Slip”. To think, Will Ferrel, Will Arnett or even Will Rogers could have started the show with one of their own videos of babies cursing or something equally funny, but no – they chose us. And what an honor it is! At least it is in my fantasy world where I am friends with Mr. Ferrel and we hang out to trade ideas on great new comedy sketches and he even lets me drive his car. But really – Funny or Die broadcasts in widescreen now, and so does Franks and Beans. Who did it first is unimportant. But it might have been us.
You also might notice an improvement in the picture quality beyond the new 16x9 screen image, and that’s simply because the new format was preceded by a hefty boost in the file size we’re allowed to upload. This has been in effect for a little while longer, if I’m remembering correctly, but you might just be noticing it now…because I’m telling you about it. Check it out, really! It looks nicer than before. So we’re shooting in widescreen to accommodate the new parameters, and the quality is sharper because of the resolution we’re allowed to keep. What’s next for us – high definition? NO!!! But not because we couldn’t – oh, no. The ability and the desire is there, but unfortunately the file size that would create is still over the website’s limits. Maybe one day, though…if we all pray hard enough.
“The Slip” is more than just a technological breakthrough that we will all be benefiting from well into the next century, though – it’s also chock full of interesting back-story that you, the discerning viewer, crave so ravenously. The ideas behind most Franks and Beans episodes generate spontaneously, which I’m sure comes as little surprise, but “The Slip” was really a 4th-quarter miracle, and it owes its creations to the fact that I was hungry for breakfast this chilly morning. Running out the door toward another full and enriching day of filming, I managed to grab a banana that was about one or two days from being too brown to eat (unless you like to eat bananas with a straw). I needed to eat it, as I feel sad if one lonely banana has to get thrown away rather than fulfill its destiny of becoming nutrients for my insides.
Now, despite what any cartoon of a man falling into a trash dumpster may tell you, I don’t think that banana peels are inherently funny. What we have here is an idea that has its moment, what, 200 years ago?, and ever since we’ve been beating the same horse to death over and over. Yes, the inside of a banana peel is relatively slick. Yes, given the ABSOLUTE IDEAL CONDITIONS, a well-placed banana peel might cause someone to slip a bit. So what we’re playing with here is not the idea that banana peels are funny, but society’s unnatural preoccupation with this simple sight gag and what might really happen if anyone actually tried to pull the stunt in real life. What we’re left with is at least a variation of the trick of misdirection – instead of going for the obvious skull-busting slip, we’re hopefully making the more mundane ending funnier because of that. There’s the anticipation, the build up, the waiting, and then…! nothing. And I love it.
This isn’t to say that something like this is new or original to Franks and Beans, as it harkens back to the ultra-short “An Old Joke” episode, where we basically did the same thing but in verbal form. What’s funny about the feedback I received is that some people actually expected Larry to say “He didn’t say!” in that particular episode, and I got some of the same reactions with this newer episode – a few called it beforehand – “oh, you’ll slip on the banana peel.” It’s hard for me to believe comments like this, because really, why would that be funny? In any remote way? Is Franks and Beans that unimaginative that we’d do the equivalent of reading a knock-knock joke online? Oh Lord, I hope not. If anything, people should get bored by saying “oh, you’ll do something other than slip on the banana peel.” I mean, I guess that leaves someone disappointed either way, but at least this way I can live with.
If you didn’t quite enjoy the ending to this particular episode, take heart! For your deliverance is at hand. Or at any rate, there’s a second chance for this one to be funny, as I had two endings in mind when I thought of the basics to “The Slip”. Rather than pick the strongest ending like a serious filmmaker, Larry and I decided to film both – the second of which will be released with the much-ballyhooed alternate ending! See, Hollywood is rubbing off on us more and more every day. Which will you prefer? Think of it like one of those “Choose Your Own Ending” books that were popular 20 years back, except there’s no chance of you falling into a snake pit this time around.
Lastly, I’ll admit that coming up with 19 different “NO!” sequences for the end of episodes has been challenging, even if the first five or so were just the same thing over and over (what was with those?!). That’s why I’m always dumbfounded when something as brilliantly simple as Larry gargling takes me this long to figure out before we use it. We did two takes of this ending, and between them Larry had to change shirts because he got water all over the first one. What I’m saying is, I didn’t want to give the impression that he was lactating or anything if we went with the second shot, which we did during the editing stage.
That was inappropriate. I shouldn’t have insinuated that Larry has the mammary glands of a woman, which release a milky fluid in times of stress or extreme concentration. Why would I put something out there like that? It could lead to the spread of vicious, hurtful rumors that probably aren’t true, and I don’t want that to happen. Not even a little.
I’m finishing this blog on a Monday, which means there’ll be new stuff for you to watch right now, so don’t waste your time doing stupid things like “reading” when you could be watching the extended “Is it Cold in Here?” and the aforementioned alternate ending to today’s subject, “The Slip”! We’re filming again soon, so look for new episodes as soon as next week! See you then!
Merry Christmas!
- Jeff M.
