Apologizing is hard. Admitting you are wrong sucks. And you need think of words to say. Uch.

We want to make eating crow easy, so here are a three apologies that should see you through any situation you encounter.

You are Jesse Jackson Arriving Late to a Dinner Party
I regret my tardiness, I was entangled by the snarls and digressions of the public transportation system.

You are a Guy who Ejaculated Into Your Roommate's Humidifier
I'm sorry I'm hilarious. But at least it's something to remember me by. Life is the accumulation of stories. Now, whenever people are swapping tales of bad roommates at a bar, you can stare into the middle distance, take a sip of your drink, and say "I've got that beat".

You are a Dog that has shit on a wedding cake
whimper. paw paw. sad eyes. paw. lick. tail wag.