Keep the funny coming. And keep this guy away from me.



Lizardladyfla expands her animal expertise:

Gold:Gerhardguffaw He sees no evil
Only good times to be had
But he still can't look

HAHAHAHA,it's too perfect for the picture !!

Silver:mpg79 I may be hairy
But at least my feet are clean
Girl, you're no prime-mate

I loved the word play......prime-mate,hehehe

Bronze:Amy4Birds I hope the monkey
Wore protection, paid cash, and
Gave a fake number.

Ummmm,I might have done that before :)

Honerable mention:WI... MONKEY AND COUGAR
SHE NEEDS TO DE-TOX HER FEET
HE NEEDS PAPER SACK

Maybe they got that way wrapped around his neck,dirty monkey ?

Some of you fuckers are really funny. Others of you need to seek professional help. Anyway, today's pic reminds me of some nights that I, too, would like to forget.



cassafrass conveys:

Here are the 8/21 winners:

**Honorable Mention:
This pussy runs deep
No barking up the wrong tree
Feel this log baby

(mpg79 - "feel this log baby" - SUPERB!!!)

**Bronze:
Commune with Nature
I try, but can't find forest
come in my Wranglers

(FissureFilms: "Commune with nature" - brilliant! And Wranglers? Hahaha!)

**Silver:
It is a sad day
When dreams and reality
Are so far apart

(JoeLeeThree: "Dreams and Reality are so far apart" This is simply a beautiful and insightful haiku!)

**Gold:
Leaf her alone now
she's had enough woodpeckers
poke holes in her trunk

(Lizardladyfla: I had the hardest time choosing between the 3 you wrote, but Woodpeckers wins the gold!!!)

I'm back. Haiku's back. Time to celebrate. FYI, almost no one has expressed interest in making Vegas happen. So, I'm going to back off the idea unless someone else wants to take the reins.



FissueFilms rates:

Please will you accept
apology in Haiku?
Judge me not. I you.

**MOST HONORABLE MENTION:
Oh let's go derrive
Don't be partial, I'd rather
Integrate their pi
-DR WHO

But if we're not partial, how can we be certain that we'll find a pi to integrate with?...I have no idea what I'm talking about. Math...grrrr...Hey, genius! You misspelled "derive" ! ;)

***SILVER***
WHAT EVERY MAN NEEDS
GIRLS THAT COME WITH INSTRUCTIONS
TAB A IN SLOT B ???
-WILLIBOY

"???" Love it! Even with instructions, man still can't figure them out...SLOT B's the butt, right?

***BRONZE***
These girls got answers
To the question asked by man
What is your breast size?
-Gerhardguffaw

They sure do, wise one. But they could pretty much say anything and we'd believe them.
Speaking of those who've got the answers --

***GOLD***
Nerd pornography
need not compete with Playboy,
Both heads satisfied
-csymonz (CASS)

That they know US so well frightens me to no end...including but not limited to the fabled and wonderful "SLOT B."
Enlightened Haiku, Cass.


If I had a gong right now, I'd bang it......
what?...who said, "use my hand?"...
A bunch of beautiful, twisted minds. all of you.

CONTEST IS FINISHED!

OK, So, the only dates that have been suggested are still 9/11-9/14 by drwho. Stro mentioned the possibility of some time in November. Even though the topless pools will be closed by November, I'm pretty much down for either date. So, how about the rest of you give it some thought over the next two weeks while I'm travelling and post your preferences?



I'm off to Chicago, Baltimore, and Philadelphia. I'll be meeting up with ClayJunky (and possibly MPG) on the last leg of the trip. If any other Fodonites will be in one of those areas, give me a holla. Otherwise, I hope to see more of you in Vegas.

P.S. Haikus to resume August 20.

I need to know: Does anyone else find this sexy or has being a professor perverted me beyond all hope?



bigjas makes his big debut:

Bronze Csymonz
This is so Sexist
I don't like to see man boobs
Or your beans & frank
even though i will no longer be able to go to the beach.

Silver Lizardladyfla
Lets add another
No fat guys with speedos on
Who are they kidding
It looks like i've been kidding no-one

Gold FissureFilms
No beach for fat chicks
love beach!must get sexchange
Ow!sand in dick hole
The grass is not always greener on the other side

This is the funniest sign ever.

Wi... dots down:

SHOW
Amy4Birds My car's a shitbox!
Because of the bird droppings?
No! It's a Peugeot.
SHITBOX HAHAHA
PLACE

bigjas Parked my Peugeot
Under tree for birds to see
covered in guano.
GUANO HAHAHAHA
WIN

bigjas Left it one hour ago
It had been cleaned and polished
Oh well shit happens
DAMN RIGHT SHIT HAPPENS
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH