"And throw some Vitamin waters in there, too. I'm trying to be healthier in 2009."

Britney's latest Rolling Stone cover wasn't one of her best

"And throw some Vitamin waters in there, too. I'm trying to be healthier in 2009."

Mike, it's Ike. Get a mass email together. Yeah everyone. The 3 Musketeers, Sugar Daddy, Baby Ruth. You can even invite those weird little Sour Patch freaks. I found a chick that will do ANYTHING for sweets.

"Help, I've fallen and can't get up,.....oh, wait a second.....nevermind, I'm fine."

Someone threw away a perfectly good fat chick!

I wonder if she can dive into it like Scrooge McDuck with his money???

The aftermath of the Reagan administration accepting ketchup as a nutritional food item.

I bet ya there's a can of Diet Coke somewhere in that pile.

'...and a Diet Coke please'

Does diabetes really need a promotional poster?

Thank God for another U.S. cover up.

America! Fuck Yeah!

Richard Simmon's nightmare, chocolate, fat, and a female.

American Gluttony

That room? Oh there's nothing in there. Just storage.

Melanie always had a chip on her shoulder & a box full of chocolates.

Someone get that woman a Snuggie!!!

It's Nutrageous, I know. But she'll let us Snicker her Milky Way with a Zagnut for only a 100 Grand.

Can't wait for the insulin bukkake.

Postnatal Bristol was uncertain with going through with the photo op, but like most of America, couldn't resist a wink from her mother's brown eye.

If a Snickers bar fell between her thighs, would anyone eat it?

bleaching her skin didn't make Oprah look as thin as she had hoped.

Smell my Butterfinger.

Shoes by Chanel, body by McDonalds.

Why would anyone throw away a perfectly good fat chick?