Now if we could just figure out how to make an ass taste like an apple.....

No not fanny smith… I said ‘granny’ smith!

The real question: Is this a crabapple?

you know you want to smell it.

Is this organic??

mmm. my favorite pooji apples.

Doctors finally pinpointed a way in which to tell the Olsen twins apart.

Fiona Apples’ first yeast infection.

wow, way to raise the bar you damn pear…what are real women like me supposed to do now!!! I hate produce!

Crotchless apples are especially juice this time of year.

Before the whole Garden of Eden thing, it used to be called a Britney and looked like this.

That apples got a nice pear. AHAHAHAHA

OMG, is that Britney?

The supple curves of one so fair, as you, it’s true, my senses dare. Though sweet be your lips, they cannot compare, to the heavenly flesh of such a glorious pear.

does my testicle look funny?

Granny Smith always new why they named an apple after her.

Finally an apple even a teacher would love

Boy that is one giant apphole

The real inspiration for apple bottom jeans

The Produce Manager always wondered why Adam always stocked the apples

A lick a day keeps the doctor away

Johnny Appleseeds wet dream

The video set for Sir Mix A-Lot’s comeback song “Vagina’s From The Back”

Kirk: “Scotty! give me full power!!!.” Mr. Scott: “I am Cap’n, it’s no use. It’s got us. We’ll never escape from the gravitational pull of the rings around Uranus.”

Goatse has gone fruit