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Existence of Heaven Proved by Small Child. Obviously.
Giffords Recovery Continues To Impress Doctors; Has First Sexual Encounter Since Shooting
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Inbreeding Dwarfs may hold key to cure for Cancer
9 People Who Newspapers Are Waiting For to Die
10 Things the NY Times Could've Bought with the Money They Spent to Create a Paywall
Front Page Perfectly Sums Up The Week That Was
Wow! What A Wiener, Weiner!
Three-Month Pregnancy Now Available Thanks to Amazing New Pill
Couple Exchanges Rings for Fingers in Surprising Surgical Ceremony
Man Accuses Bigfoot of Sexual Assault
Man whose wife cut off his penis finds the act “clichéd”
Hotel Pennsylvania Voted Best in City for Murdering Prostitutes
Jake Gyllenhaal Sets to Prove Heterosexuality by only Sleeping with Ugly Men
Man Botches Suicide Attempt By Safely Walking Around East Half of Brooklyn
Accolades For Poorly-Written Article Motivated By Desire To Sleep With Columnist
Dinosaur Extinction Linked To Gay Marriage
Hugh Hefner Murders Seven Playmates, Posts Crime Scene On Twitter
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