DAVES CAPTION CONTEST FOR DEC.3RD... CLICK HERE...
http://www.funnyordie.com/blog/posts/7201

Hello, my name is Farmer Brown...and I'm addicted to Internet Corn!

I only shucked corn to pay for college.

Gaurenteed to make you pop! ...Or my name isn't Orville Redenbacher's erect penis!

One of the Federal Food & Drug Association's lesser known typo's...not as well covered up as the Porned Beef scare of 1978.

HEY EARL,lookie here,they got one that wiggles!

If Jack Frost has a corncob pipe, it's only fair that Mrs. Frost get something, too.

A must have for your redneck girl:) Send her hee hawing in more ways then one!

Not as popular in Idaho as the Potatobrator, but WAY more popular in Hawaii than the Pineapplebrator.

Cornucopulate

Calicornya?

Be careful where you leave it, everbody loves an ear of corn.

I dont use one of these,(there is'nt a kernel of truth to that)

A new way to make pop-corn,if you go real fast it's quicker than a micro-wave

The jolly green giant has a sense of humor

I love creamed corn

At least you wont find corn in your stool the next day

See back for more info: Need three AAA battery or for more pleasure use plug in adapter,it love you long time.

Always ready in a Jiffy

Just make sure and read the directions,,,,,,,,,this things a bitch on your teeth!

Now we know why Scarecrow was Dorothy's favorite!

we, the people of iowa, fail to see the humor in todays pic...just kidding, that's how most girls lose their virginity here!

cornholed again!

I've heard of popping corn, but corn popping cherries?!

When we turn up the heat this corn is gonna pop your socks off, babe!

Invented by, Bubba Burns, while settin' in the outhouse in the hills of West Virginia.

No more niblets for you, my dear, cuz I just went out and got you the "real deal".

Darling, how'd you like to cream my corn tonight?

Old MacDonald had a farm... d-i-l-d-o...
And on that farm, he shot some porn... d-i-l-d-o

Proof positive that Jolly Green Giant Marital Aids are the bomb!

A Christmas gift for that woman in your life who always wanted to screw the scarecrow from "The Wizard of Oz."

Never be intimate with something that comes with a 90 day warranity

Free with the purchase of our new corn husk sex doll. (Corn huck sex doll, for people who like it rough)

You mean it's not a door stop?

I'd Shuck it.

Heidi Fleiss Butter Ejaculator

stick it up your ass & you have a can of corn

i can't wait to see their potato butt-plugs and liver pocket pussies

if you got pregnant from this would you have children of the corn ???

Has that dude got a small hand or what?

I love the duel purpose, you can use the other end as a mini flashlight.

Smart thinkin', Molly, you can remove the batteries and hide in the kids toy box when your mother comes over! Hiding the old one in the toothbrush drawer never worked, did it.!

The Nebraska Quickie

now YOU can run backwards through your "own" corn field!

I'm gonna butta yo corn

Why Iowans went extinct.

This one's the vibrator, what have you got?

Damn squirrels keep stealing my sex toys.

The canned version didn't sell at all.

There is a baby corn version for those intimidated by the regular sized one.

The Indians call it a maize-brator.

Guess what the succotash combo is? I don't know either, but I'm picturing anal peas and a carrot gag.

There was going to be an Indian Corn version, but the company had reservations.

Just tell me where I can buy one(dont tell any one)

whats the cost for E85 again?

You know it's classy when they use onomatopoeia on the packaging, because how else would we know what a vibrator sounds like.

Also available from this website:
http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/123278.html

You won't believe me if I tell you.

For those who enjoy a little corny humor in the sack (screw the potatoes...or don't)

Man made Plastic, God made Corn...who you gonna trust more?

Cream of Corn anyone?

(I'm tempted to get one for my wife as a White Elephant Christmas gift. I don't know if she would be insulted or confused. Any thoughts?)

WARNING: Without the use of KY products or other petroleum based lubricants, friction may cause Popping. Do Not Ingest.

Now we know what all those Nebraska Univ footballers are packin in their jocks.

Anyone a Dane Cook Fan? "aooohh My dick feels like Corn"!

"That's it, pop that pussy baby" "call me Orville Redenbocker"

When your brotherhusband just doesnt satisfy your needs anymore...

tired and want to relax and talk about your day? we will give you an earful.
*disclaimer-could cause deafness.

it seemed like a good idea, until you find your 2 yyearold playing house with it, complaining that the corn tastes like shit.

Pee wee will finally have a vibrator that fits in with the playhouse this christmas.

grandma decided to celebrate "skanksgiving" this year.

I thought vibrators were invented to avoid things like this.

FTW? (fuck the what?)

Comes in three wank speeds: hypo (slow and easy, good for those new to corn fucking), hyper (a fast and fun speed) and hypno (so wild you'll agree to anything)

Here it is...a little something for your cornhole

Don't put it in your ass, it turns to gas

Although pleased with her new birthday present, when Jenny had told her boyfriend she was determined to get more vegetables into herself this year, this really wasn't what she had in mind.

What next...butter flavored KY?

I put the setting on hyper wank and boy did i get an earfull

Yes it is a corny gift, but what do you get for a girl who has everything?

Hey how did my wish list get on here LOL j/k omg you thought I was serious! lol

Dave, your hand looks surprisingly small and feminine

I have yet to have a prison experience, so I'm a little naive, but aren't the two dudes on the cover in a position that defies anatomy?

I hope this one is better than the carrot and parsnip vibrators i had before!

Have fun explaining this one at the airport.

Now my wife orgasms when we pass a cornfield.

I just love PORN-on-the-cob.

"I'm gonna...I'm gonna...Ohhhhh...ahhhh...JUBILATION T CORNpone!"
----the dieing words of Stubby Kaye December 14, 1997