The champion walked down a road

bathed in morning dew;

Looking around, surveying his land

He knew his eyes told true;

A brand new dawn, a brand new day

The champion exclaimed;

A king amongst the people

cock and balls out, unashamed

He walked by men and women

they gasped and shut their eyes;

a few folks yelled

the champ's heart swelled

with great feelings of pride;

people know me, he then thought

look how they use their eyes;

to look at me and tell their friends

to check out that cool guy

A car honked at the champ

and he wanked with his right hand;

what happened next, a bit morose

the champ was half a man,

a shot of bourbon later;

the champion was up

asked a woman for some change

so he could fill his cup

The chick said no

he looked at her, with crazy in his eye

he chased her down

that fateful day,

she couldnt run or hide

her heel then broke, and he caught up

there was nothing she could throw

he spit a lugie on her dress

the perfect ending to his show

The cops showed up with time to spare

they locked the champ away;

the girl got up, she went right home

and threw soiled clothes away;

thus the moral of the story

I hold both strong and true;

a homeless guy, with his pants down

is a risk to me and you.

Inspired by a true story.