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Dave (phukuhp)'s Blog: DAVES "CHRISTMAS CAPTION CONTEST"
MERRY CHRISTMAS. FELICE NAVIDAD, HAPPY CHANUKAH,
HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO EVERY ONE...
WELCOME TO THE FIRST ANNUAL "DAVES CHRISTMAS CAPTION CONTEST"
I WANT TO PROPOSE A THEME FOR TODAYS CONTEST... PLEASE USE THIS FORUM TODAY TO SEND YOUR FRIENDS OR GROUPS, OR WHOEVERS A VIRTUAL CHRISTMAS GIFT... MAKE THEM TENDER, LOVING, CRASS, FUNNY, SEXY, DIRTY, SILLY, LAME, WHOLEHEARTED, INSANE, WACKY, WIERD, CRAZY, ZANY, CANDID, SHOCKING, INTENSE... YOU GET THE IDEA.
FOR TODAY EVERYONE IS DECLARED THE WINNER FOR THE HOLIDAYS.
TODAYS EARLIER WINNER WILL JUDGE FRIDAYS CONTEST...
SO OPEN YOUR HAERTS AND HEADS AND HAVE SOME FUN ... YOU MAY START CAPPING YOUR GIFTS NOW.
winners
christopher7murphy sez...
Merry Christmas Dave. Thanks for letting me preform First runner up duties for the Dec 24th contest...that was the one you asked me to do, wasn't it? Sorry I didn't get the message earlier...but I am a retail stooge and as soon as I got out of the mall, I had to get to my sister's to do the "christmas gorging of the ham"....burp... had a good time...but it sure feels good to get off my feet.
First place is for "Dammit! Soggy cookies again!" by Borrowed_Time because the wiseguy beat me to the funny!
Second place is "Aquari-um pa pum pum" by buttermilk ...I am a sucker for a well planned pun!
And third place is "I've been staring at it for ten minutes and I can't find anything sexual about this. What am I missing?" by snyetha ...because he broke the forth wall (if that's even possible to do in a caption contest.) And if you look closely, you can see a reflection of a very naked Mrs. Claus skinny dipping on Santa's swim goggles.
Gawd I ate too much!
Comments (67)
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................... MERRY CHRISTMAS .....................
DAVES "FIRST ANNUAL CHRISTMAS GIFT AWAY CAPTION PARTY."
PLEASE COME AND GIVE YOUR FRIENDS A VIRTUAL HOLIDAY GIFT.
http://www.funnyordie.com/blog/posts/12202#comments
TO THE F.O.D TEAM... HERES A GIFT OF THANKS FOR GIVING US A WONDERFULL VIRTUAL PLAY GROUND TO PLAY IN...
TO GOATIEGIRL... A GIFT OF LOVE AND THANKS FOR BEING MY FIRST FRIEND HERE AT FOD AND FOR BRINGING ME INTO THE WONDERFULL WORLD OF F.O.D.
TO CLAYJUNKY... HERES A GIFT OF A WEEKS FUN IN BEAUTIFULL NEW SMYRNA BEACH, FLORIDAY, AND MAKING MY CHRISTMAS FUN.
TO LIZARDLADYFLA... A GIFT OF LOVE AND GRATITUDE FOR MAKING MY DAYS A LITTLE EASIER TO GET THROUGH. AND OTHER THINGS I PROMISED I WOULDNT MENTION.
TO TURNEMS... HERE'S A YEARS SUPPLY OF ASSORTED CONDOMS SO ALL YOU LADIES HE STALKS CAN FEEL SAFE, AND BRO, I PULLED OUT THE MAGNUMS FOR MYSELF...
TO AMY4BIRDS... HERES A GIFT OF THE GREATEST GOURMAND MEAL YOU CAN IMAGINE. FOR WORRYING ABOUT ME WHEN I SAID I WASNT EATING WHEN MY PARENTS WENT TO TENNESSEE.
To Phukuhp: Thanks for being the dirty old man that you are, and creating your alt cap con. Thanks for welcoming new members, and being the unofficial FOD "WalMart greeter." You're funny, but most of all you mean well and fall under the, "he's good people" umbrella.
Merry Christmas.
YOU HAVE A GIFT WAITING FOR YOU AT...
DAVES, "FIRST ANNUAL CAPTION GIFTAWAY.
TO RECEIVE CLICK HERE ==============>
http://www.funnyordie.com/blog/posts/12202#comments
................... MERRY CHRISTMAS .....................
CUT AND PASTE THE LAST CAPTION TO TELL YOUR FRIENDS THEY HAVE A GIFT WAITING HERE AT THE GIFT AWAY.
TO DESSY... A GIFT OF SUPPORT FOR HER CHARITY TO HELP FEED THE ELDERLYS PETS... PLEASE HELP HER, THE OWNERS, AND OF COURSE THE PETS TO HAVE HAPPY AND HEALTHY LIFE. GO TO HER PAGE AND TELL HER YOU WANT TO DONATE TO THE CAUSE AND SHE WILL SHOW YOU HAVE... NOW GO DO SOMETHING GOOD.
Love you and your big appetite for silliness and playfulness! Merry Christmas, darling Dave.
TO LITHO... A GIFT OF HOPE AND HAPPINESS IN YOUR UP COMING MARRIAGE...
THAT LUCKY PHUKIN DAWG.
I think I may have to change my panties after this one :)
TO MPG... A GIFT OF STRENGTH, AND THE PROMISE THAT I WILL LIFT ANY BURDEN FROM YOUR SHOULDERS THAT I CAN.
I love you Dave...thank you
TO BILLOSTAP... A GIFT OF CONTINUED IMAGINATION... LOVE YOUR ART
TO WESTSIDESLANT... A GIFT OF CONTIUED GENUIS, TO CONTINUE YOUR WRITING AND HUMOR.
TO WILLSTHEMASTER... A GIFT OF DETERMINATION THST YOU'LL MAKE IT HERE NEXT YEAR AND SPEND SOME TIME WITH US...
A GIFT TO JIMBOBALOUIE... A GIFT OF PATIENCE FOR THAT POOPING PUPPY. WE ALL CAN TELL HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THAT DAWG
A GIFT FOR CHRISTOPHER7MURPHY... A GIFT OF LAUGHTER FOR ALL YOUR GREAT CAPTIONS.
You remembered! I recall your first email to me, and how I told you a little bit of how it works (shit, that's a constant theme, how it works....). I loved our last flurry of messages. It felt like old times. You're a sweetie but I wouldn't want to meet you in a dark alley! Love you. Thanks for the memories!
A GIFT FOR MY SOUL BRO CHADDER... A GIFT OF FAMILY, FOR HAVING A COOL HEAD AND THE DRIVE TO PUT HIS BACK TOGETHER. BLESS YOU MY MAN.
TO JASON2K1... A GIFT OF ENLIGHTENMENT TO PASS ON TO THOSE WHO LEARN FROM HIM.
TO FUNNYBONE... THE GIFT OF TENACITY, IM PULLING FOR YOU TO GET YOUR WEBSITE GOING AND THAT IT IS SUCCESSFULL. BY THE WAY I WANNA DO THE CAPTION CONTEST, I WORK CHEAP.
TO WILLIBOY... A GIFT OF A FIFTH FINGER... BUT EVEN THOUGH HES A CRIP, HE WRITES SOME OF THE BEST CAPTIONS IVE SEEN. DID YOU KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE THOUGHT YOU WERE ME BECAUSE OF A SIMILAR SENSE OF HUMOR AND THE LOVE OF CAPPING IN CAPS.
Thanks Dave! Your a peach! I hope you have a great holiday and have fun with Clay! You two don't get into to much trouble!
TO LEELPC04... THE GIFT OF A PROPER SPIT CUP, I LOVED YOUR COP BLOG "CAN YOU GO TO JAIL FOR LAUGHING" EXPETATE AND CAP HAPPILY MY FRIEND
TO ZOOKEEP... THE GIFT OF A NEW HASSOCK. CAUSE I SAT ON HIS OTTOMAN.
WEAR YOUR BIG YELLOW BUTTON WITH PRIDE.
TO GRIZZ1, MY OTHER BROTHER BY A DIFFERENT BIKE... THE GIFT OF NIMBLE FINGERS TO KEEPN FRO-NINJA COMING OUR WAY. BLESS YOU BRO AND KEEP ALL YOUR RIDES RUNNING RIGHT.
TO IAN RENGA.... THE GIFT OF DRIVE. NOT THAT HE NEEDS IT BUT THE MAN AND HIS INTELLECT HAS HIS FINGERS INMANY DIFFERENT PIES. AND A COUPLE OF FANTASTIC CARS.
TO BUTTERMILK.... THE GIFT OF MIRTH. NO ONE CAN TURN A PHRASE LIKE SHE DOES. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.
thank you, dave, for all the love, laughs and GREAT advice and support when i needed it most! and thanks for this wondeful cap contest (somedays i don't even look at FOD's) lookin forward to day when we can go for a ride together!
Thank you for welcoming the new guy...You put a lot of personality into FoD and made me feel so at home...and encouraging me to be silly! I never saw so many other people with wicked silly and dangerous imaginations on one site before! Imagine what we could do if we all met in one room!
Merry Christmas Dave...and thanks for letting me play with the rest of th... more >
To everyone who gathers here, good cheer and a rewarding year ahead. All of you make my day full of chuckles and joy. To Dave, a big thanks for all of your efforts toward promoting good humor, friendship and community. JJ
TO SABRE419... A SPECIAL GIFT. I AM PREPARING FOR YOU MY FAMOUS AND PUBLISHED OUT CAHRT FOR 150 AND DOWN... IF YOU MEMORIZE IT YOU WILL BECOME A 70% WINNER WITHOUT AN INCREASE OF YOUR PHYSICAL PROWESS.
KNOWLEGE OF THE GAME IS 80% OF WINNING. YOU LUCKY DEVIL, USE IT WELL.
If Santa can see his penis it's 6 more weeks of winter.
The gift that keeps on giving.(me nightmares that is)
It has been a true pleasure getting to post on here and meet so many wonderful new friends. To all of you, I give the gift of boredom because it is the one thing I know for sure that none of you have. I have a few extra presents to leave the few people I have had the privilege to get to know especially well...
To Phukuhp: Dave, you are truly a great man. You have been the catalyst for so much of the humor and comraderie I have found on this site. I offer you the gift of prescience so that you may always see the bliss that you are bringing to others.
To Westsideslant: Mark, after all the caption contests you have won, I eagerly await your gift of collaboration and enthusiastically offer mine in return. And since you are as kind as you are witty - which is really saying something - I should probably get you something meaningful, too. Maybe a lottery ticket?
To Willisthemaster: Michaela, I have more fun with you away from FOD than on here these days. I can't wait to come to Ireland, but in the meantime, I offer you the gift of reflection so that you may see yourself as others see you: funny, beautiful, and overdressed.
To Buttermilk: Karen, I often ask myself whether I get more pleasure out of reading your captions or reading your comments on my captions. It is probably a tossup. I can't imagine FOD without your cleverness or kindheartedness. I was going to offer you the gift of a stereotype-a-day calendar, but the more I think about it, I may just get you a fruitcake.
December's centerfold for A.A.R.P. magazine
THANK YOU DAVE FOR BEING THE FIRST AT FOD TO POP MY CHERRY,BY BEING THE FIRST TO SUB ME.I LOOK FORWARD TO YOUR CAP CONTEST,I CAN GET MORE RAUNCHY HERE,YOU ARE THE FOD KING.....AND YOU KNOW IT !!
AWWWWWW,WAS'NT DAVE CUTE WHEN HE WAS A BABY ??
To Turnems, a computer that will not type "Birthday". You are kind-hearted, generous to others & able to accept my insults in the manner in which they were meant. (Mean) Seriously, I'm glad to "know" you. (but not in a biblical sense.) The site would be impoverished without you.
To Goatie Girl, a new thermos to replace the cup of human kindness she spills all over the site. Without argument she is the most caring goat (human bean) here. Ask for an arm, she'll give you a leg. (even if you didn't want it.) She is wise & when she & Turnip get together you can be sure you'll spend hours sending birthday greetings to people you've never met.
to Lucy Lieu, one of my first loves....proudly Canadian, & expecting the same of me especially when I travel. I gift you a new Canadian flag, beer cooler, a year of saying eh without ridicule and one day without punning the heck out of us.
To Nivems, a gift of a plaid, flannel shirt & a toque. He was my first & the man against whom all others are measured. (If I am fanned, they only stay before him until they are thanked...a trade secret.) I don't see him as much lately. All good things.
To Bubbalicious wherever you are my sincere thanks for your friendship, your great captions & the ability to have your priorities in order. Best in 2009.
TO ALL WHO CAP HERE,MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS.YOU ARE TRULY SOME FUNNY,WITTY AND DOWN RIGHT NAUGHTY PEOPLE,I LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING YOU ON FOD EVERY DAY,THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL AT HOME HERE
Saint Dick
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEW YEAR AND THE COMING LAUGHTER!
To you, good Dave, for providing a caption contest that jerk-offs can't die bomb. You are a good man sir.
Also, to all my friend and caption cohorts, you all make this site such a fun place to come everyday. I wish you all the best.
Caption: "For Christmas, I got you a censor bar. You decide what to do with it."
Before I wish you all a merry christmas I just want to say Have a great christmas..now with that being said... MERRY CHRISTMAS!!
tokatecastellas... a girt of mirth and mrryment this christmas season.
thanks for being my friend
to awryone: the new guy bon the block, a gift of welcome. thanks for coming oon board and having fun withus all. hope youir here for a long time to come
To all my FOD friends, Thanks for giving me a happy holiday season. You really know how to put the rist in Christmas. Peace and prosperity in the new year> I love you all.
God...Please don't let me be on his naughty list!
TO LUCY LIEU... THE GIFT OF RHETORIC. YOU ALWAYS TURN THE PERFECT PHRASE.
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR CHRISTMAS WIN.
FOR KETTEELF... JUST SOME MORE OF SOMETHING SHE A LOT OF... LOVE...
IT SURLEY SHOWS IN THE WAY SHE TREATS HER FAMILY AND FRIENDS. SHE MAKES US ALL BETTER PEOPLE.
SORRY TO ALL THOSE PEOPLE ON MY STALKER LIST THAT I DIDNT GET TO LEAVE A PERSONAL GIFT... TO EVERYONE.... THE GIFT OF PLEASURE (I WAS SAVEING THIS FOR MYSELF, BUT I REALLY DO LIKE TO SHARE) I HOPE I GIVE A LITTLE TO EVERYBODY HERE AT FOD EVERY DAY. HAVE FUN EVERYONE.
Thanks Santphuk. I thought you were a jolly fellow because you were just high, but now I see to are just a giver. Happy New Year
Thank you so much Dave, you have a big heart-big guy!
xo, kate
really dig Santa's moonlighting farmer's tan