you cant fire me i quit

bageldog bageldog

I truly believe all dogs can talk, they just choose not to because they are smarter then us. I believe that cats are up to something, but are far to stupid to pull it off. I think that if there is an all seeing all knowing god, that watches over us, A. he's probably bored shitless and B. I'm probably fucked. confident people aren't paying attention. reality is all in the mind. the meek shall inheret the earth, but wont be able to pay the taxes, so the lawers will end up with it. most racists are only in it for the jokes. I'm pretty sure that money can indeed buy happiness. beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but ugly is for everyone. sometimes i wonder if its all worth it. then i remember I can't afford it anyway. they say no good deed goes unpunished, but I'm betting theres quite a few that go unnoticed. maybe paranoid people are right. if life gives you lemons, your probably waiting in the wrong line. bored people think they live longer. blondes might have more fun, but bald people spend less on shampoo. I still feel kind of grown up when ever i shave. deaf people make lousy telephone repair men. youth isn't waisted on the young, the old would just sit around bitching about it. the only thing that separates man from animals is walls and roofs.( and clothing and speech and wallets and thumbs and all kids of stuff really) people that read what i write don't think i'm nearly as clever as i think I am. I secretly think all women are lesbians, they are just being nice to us. most men would be bisexual if all the other men wer'nt so icky. there is no time like the present, but theres always time for the future. people that live in glass houses probably arent throwing stones at their own homes. they also probably pay allot more on insurance and curtains. people in wood houses shouldnt throw fire. ill probably have more. but thats it for now