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October 22, 2009


Having any kind of perseverence in the retail world heavily relies on one's sense of humor. You either have to have absolute none or you have to have an abundance, there is NO in between that would guarantee you any kind of longevity. First thing this morning, I'm following my boss on a store walk- through, and there's this short, round, beady-eyed woman staring at us. My intuition begs to ignore her, but my boss asks her if she requires any assistance which she responds to with this creepy, over exagerrated widenig of her eyes and a "how come you haven't asked me sooner?" nod. He walks on, I smile and offer to help her. So...she's trying to buy sheet protectors (the clear pockets you insert in a binder to hold/protect sheets of paper), which seems simple enough. She bought some, somehow they were the "wrong" ones and she doesn't know which of them are the "right" ones. Fine. I hear her description and suggest a couple of packs and get angrily shot down for the mere suggestion! Two things about this :1) there are only really two types of sheet protectors (sideloading or top loading), so if I recommend one or the other.... ?? and 2) if she's going to shout me down and talk over me whilst not listening to me or answering my questions, then what the Hell does she need me there for? She's essentially still looking for something on her own with me just standing there for her to hate on. So..whatever. She finally decides that what she bought before and liked was a pack of super heavyweight protectors..."do they come in a larger box size?" No. The regular heavyweight ones come in a 25 or a box of 50, but the super heavy weight only come in a pack of 25. "What's the difference?" The super heavyweight are a 5 ml weight and the other ones are only 3.3. "What does that mean?" It means that the super heavy weight are roughly a third thicker than the regular heavyweight. "What does that mean?" It means it's thicker. "How am I supposed to know this? How am I supposed to know what 5 mils is?" Well, you could imagine, for just a moment, that it's the thickest one that we sell and if you want the thickest one that we sell and remember buying it before and being very satisfied, you should probably (just shut up and) buy it again. "How am I supposed to KNOW what it FEELS like?" I suggest that she open the package. "Well! SNARL THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN ASKING YOU!!!" I say "Actually, no. That's not what you asked me, ever. But, feel free to open the pack. Have a nice day." And I quickly walked away and went to the back to make fun of her. I'll never understand why people would rather make a point of being stupid, because she's essentially saying "I'm stupid, unpleasant and unimaginative, explain a SHEET PROTECTOR TO ME!" than think for themselves for just a moment and save themselves the embarassment. How do these people get dressed in the morning? Tie their shoes or cross the street without someone to help them? I have NO idea how they survive. So, the next I hear someone is paging an associate to the front, and I see her and her nasty face at the counter, so I go back to the back to make fun of her on camera waiting for someone else to come serve her. My poor cashier gets affronted by her ill manners again as she has come to exchange the sheet protectors and the package is open and there is no receipt. And, she'd like to get things on seperate bills. And, she's still waiting for someone to come and fetch her something from the aisles. LOL A word to the wise, when you want people to HELP you, be nice and they will happily help you. When you're a bitch to someone and completely alienate the only other person in the store who has english as a first language and knows where all the shit is...you might want to even bring them a coffee or compliment their weight loss (real or imagined), otherwise they will sit at the back and laugh at you while you look around all haughty and bewildered, fists on hips just a waitin' to give someone a talkin' to. I seriously wish that I could get away with keeping some sealed plastic bags of coagulated red koolaid in the back, so when a bitch like that comes in and wants to drink my blood I can just hand her a bag of it. LMAO!! PS I seriously wish that everyone I've ever met that thought I was a bitch could have a chance to breakfast with this woman. It might give them some perspective.