Full Credits

Stats & Data

September 23, 2011

You know KATY Perry's "Teenage Dream"? These are the lyrics to RICK Perry's "American Dream".


Katy Perry...flashy, young, hip, progressive, cool. 

Rick Perry...uh. 

I know which Perry I'd rather have for president. Just imagine if Rick took to "Bubblegum pop" in an effort to get votes! 



By Michael Lake


Listen to it in the background by clicking here . 


My name is Ricky, and I’m your next President
I’m kinda folksy and get along great with kids
I want your votes please, your nomination will count, count

Used to be liberal, but that was a wreck
So I switched to the right side, never looked back from right
Now next January, I want to be sworn in, sworn in

Let's go all the way this year
Texas rules, for life
I support the right to die
Let's execute some non-American criminals!

You and me can live a new U.S. dream
From Governor to White House, please
I'll run for prez and we'll kick out Barack
Let's evict Barack! 

I've got views on a bunch of things
What's the fun with no controversy?
Israel, a big issue with me
Disagree with Barack, don't agree with Barack!

I'm just like Georgie, ran the same state as he
In charge of Texas for eleven years nearly
But I want more now, the complete Presidency
So vote me!

The next President is white
And I'm just like Bush
Except I have no dark demons
I'm all clean, and I'm oh so boring!

Let me lead you to a new U.S. dream
I'm against everything, no reprieves
I'll veto it and don't ever amend
Forever votes no!

I'll stop bills when they come near me
Health care's fine, don't get married
Unless you're straight, yeah, that's my plan
We won't legalize this in the state of Texas!

But I will be stressing the old death penalty
My old Texas dream tonight
Really means a lot to me, my strongest policy
Make it mandatory tonight

Last few years, Obama's changed some things
It really winds me up, I can't sleep
Let's run campaigns and oust that Barack
Let's impeach Barack

This race starts when I get GOP
Try my best, to get candidacy
This is real, so take a chance
And vote Bush Jr. Lite, everything will be alright

I'm a get your country back from that big-eared geek
Be your U.S. dream tonight
Just put your faith in me and my dude ranch jeans
The plainest candidate in sight. 

I'm white.