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August 17, 2017

What it feels like to NOT watch Game of Thrones

I don’t watch Game of Thrones. I mean it. Really, I don’t watch it. I’ve never watched an episode. Not even one. I don’t know the name of the blonde woman who has been on the show since Season One and the Jason Momoa’s character. I know who Peter Dinklage is because I watch independent films and Dinklage had a few decent ones. I know there’s a character on the show named “Tragoren-something,” and that most of the characters who you expect to survive on Game of Thrones, die.

It’s romantic when you’re not watching the same show as everyone else in California, but it‘s also lonely. So, why not just make it easier on myself by turning on the TV and watching the show?

Reason 1 Not to Watch Game of Thrones: I’m engaged. Were I single I’d reconsider since the majority of human beings watch it, and I can’t imagine Tindering right now without it.

Reason 2 Not to Watch Game of Thrones: Too many hours are needed to catch up to you. Friends tell me that there’s ‘lots of time to do that kind of thing on the weekend.

Reason 3 Not to Watch Game of Thrones: If I’m going to watch something I prefer to watch NBA basketball. During off-season when basketball isn’t being broadcast, I’d prefer to listen to podcasts about NBA basketball.

Reason 4 Not to Watch Game of Thrones: My siblings want me to. They slip it in between their talks about lavish vacations. What if I started to watch Game of Thrones, and, accidentally, a conversation about Tragoran-something morphed into a one week trip to the Four Seasons hotel in Maui? What if I inadvertently committed to a vacation that I couldn’t afford? I’d be broke.

Reason 5 Not to Watch Game of Thrones: To save time. If you’re someone who watches Game of Thrones, you’re also someone who reads about Game of Thrones on the internet. Not me. I skip over the blogs, commentaries, photos, and live streams, and use that time to read books about income inequality. While you’re being entertained by dragons and princesses and dwarves, I’m educating myself about race relations in America. Sometimes I even volunteer at the homeless shelter, or strike up a conversation with the street.

Reason 6 Not to Watch Game of Thrones: You’ll have more alone-time. When that happens, you’ll connect spiritually to the world around you, and find solace. During this quiet time your doubt and insecurity will rise to the surface, and you will have no choice but to face it. You’ll second guess yourself. Likely, you’ll be terrified, and wish you were someone richer and more successful than yourself, like the entertainer Drake.

If you’re truly disciplined and committed to not watching Game of Thrones, there will still be plenty of time left to watch NBA basketball.