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July 20, 2015

Garbage News

What’s Really Inside Your Trash Can: Trash, Mostly

We all encounter it everyday; in the kitchen, in the bathroom, behind the door of the changing rooms at the seedier hair extension stores; trash. Our bodies are surrounded by garbage and yet we don’t even know what’s inside. Well maybe you do because you put it there. But chances are you have no idea. That’s why I took the brave plunge into my own kitchen garbage can to find out what garbage is really made of. Turns out it’s mostly garbage.

The top layer of the bin was mostly decomposed and unidentifiable kitchen scraps that I’ll just refer to here as refuse. And there was half of a lemon poppy seed muffin from Trader Joe’s that had grown a fungus because I left it out on the counter. Thanks for all the good times, buddy!

Under the refuse was an amalgamation of damp paper towels, take out containers, toe nail clippings, overcooked noodles, undercooked noodles, and a unopened bottle of Vita Coco. Hey who threw this out? Fuck it, five second rule right?

At the bottom of my garbage bin was more garbage, some litter, a bit of waste, general debris, and a Victorian style 17th century emerald and diamond engagement ring. But mostly it was garbage.