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Published April 28, 2008

So I've forgiven Carolyn for being irritating, because once I took a step back, she's actually pretty damn amusing to watch. She's easily flustered, you see, so the smallest of tasks can set off a series of events that quickly escalate into tirades of mumbling punctuated by outbursts of louder words. I actually don't know what's funnier, just calmly standing back and letting her go, or the look on the customer's confused face over her actions and my amusement. All in all, I shall let her live for now.

However, it appears that we as a team in the "Motorclothes" Department have reached a decision: Melissa must go. Melissa started the same day I did, which means I got a taste of her before anyone else (for the record, she tasted very bland, except for a pungent taste of lost dreams and adolescence). You see, she's 19, married and has a 2 year old daughter. She finds the need to loudly exclaim these things in random conversations having nothing to do with her or her daughter, or anything else having to be slightly related to her in any way. She's a story-topper, you see, but of the worst kind. The kind that is unaware of just how much they irritate those around them, and will obliviously continue wearing away at our nerves until one of us snaps and tells her exactly where she, her husband and her daughter can go. Not only that, but she does it loud enough for neighboring counties to hear. Now, I realize that she obviously had to grow up fast, and probably missed out on a few much needed beatings because it's bad to hit a pregnant girl, but I really don't know where along the way she decided she needed to interject, nay, interrupt every possible conversation with some non-sequitor story of her life. I want to feel bad for her, but my contempt, along with my co-worker's, is too overwhelming. It was funny, though, because one time we were all standing around and Melissa had just had a bad case explosive verbal diarrhea, and I accidentally let it slip just exactly how I felt about her to my co-workers, who lost it laughing and heartily agreed. We now band together to try to restrain our homicidal urges.

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