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March 07, 2010
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Those Were Different Times Contest  #28

Introducing:" Music To Sell Weyerhaeuser Hardwood Paneling By"
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11. My parents totally fell for this ad.
-rockydanz (welcome, check out her photo blog everybody.)

10. The cupstacking tournament between her and the squirrel was EPIC AWESOME SAUCE!
-MadAdam

9. Even at the best of times hard wood is a difficulty sell, especially when it involves females.
-jimbobalouie

8. Damn, I was looking for the Music to Rip All of That Fucking Paneling Out of My Basement by album.
-missalicia

7. Who knew the scientists at Weyerhaeuser developed the a tree that is ready to go paneling.
-drwho

6. I hate U2's The Joshua Tree I'm glad they made paneling out of it
-bigjas

5. I said Hey Honey, take a walk on the wild side.. "and the colored squirrel say - Doot, do doot, doot de doot do do.."
-Kooldad

4.8 3/4. The nice thing about selling wood paneling is you never get board.

4.8. Listen to Joe Cocker sing: "What wood you do if I sang out of tune."

4. Actually, the producers never got past the design of the album cover BECAUSE THERE IS NO MUSIC TO SELL FUCKING WOOD PANELING BY!!!!
-keibar

3.9999917. Frankie Goes To Hollywood's "Relax" was a song about wood paneling. Little known fact.

3.784. dragging a wood panel into the forest like that is the equivalent of spraying an entire can of Aqua Net into a polar bear's face

3.432.  LEGAL NOTICE:
"Stimson J. Squirrel, heretofore noted as 'the agitated', did not, & does not, give permission to any party or entity, including the Weyerhaeusers, to suggest, imply, or otherwise condone wood paneling in any capacity. The Agitated is concerned only in the condition of his nuts, & all offending parties are ordered to cease any & all inclusion of The Agitated from all wood paneling marketing related materials, or be subject to Poop From Above."

3.3.
Pain.
Suffering.
Acceptance.
Retribution.
Wood Paneling.

3.2. the cake her & the squirrel baked was EPIC MOIST

3. "With Weyerhaeuser's Portable Wood Paneling, You Can Feel Like Your In A Creepy Dude's Basement *Anywhere*!"
-trident

2. She’s trying to figure out how to coax the squirrel into her butt.
-theDIRTYmidget

1. Just HOW does one sell hardwood paneling without a soundtrack? I'm stumped!
-csymonz

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