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January 17, 2018
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Thank you for using this COGNITIVE POLL to get the REAL cognitive fitness numbers of our very smart President Trump.

TO: WHITE HOUSE PHYSICIAN

SUBJECT: TAKE THE PRESIDENTIAL COGNITIVE HEALTH POLL

Hello Dr. Ronny,

Thank you for using this COGNITIVE POLL to get the REAL cognitive fitness numbers of our very smart President Trump that the fake news media isn’t reporting.

1) How would you rate President Trump’s cognitive health?

GREAT

GOOD

OKAY

PERFECT

2) In a smarts contest between President Trump and Albert Einstein, who would win?

TRUMP

GREAT

GOOD

PERFECT

3) Despite having high cholesterol and ab obese body mass index, would you say that President Trump’s physical health was excellent?

YES

EXCELLENT

YES, VERY EXCELLENT

GREAT

4) How would you rate Barack Obama’s cognitive health?

OKAY

POOR

REALLY POOR

KENYAN ;)

5) Is President’ Trump’s erratic behavior the result of neurological impairment?

THERE IS NO ERRATIC BEHAVIOR

THERE IS NO NEUROLOGICAL IMPAIRMENT

THERE IS NO BEHAVIOR/IMPAIRMENT

COVFEFE ;)

6) Is President Trump a physician certified STABLE GENIUS?

YES

GREAT

PERFECT

YES

7) Do you believe the FAKE NEWS MEDIA will fairly cover President Trump’s GREAT mental health and the FACT that a DOCTOR certified him a STABLE GENIUS?

YES, BUT BY MISTAKE

NO, EXCEPT FOX NEWS

WAIT, I FORGET, IS FOX NEWS STILL A PART OF THE “NEWS MEDIA” OR ARE THEY OFFICIALLY THEIR OWN CATEGORY OF THING NOW?

GREAT

8) Even if, hypothetically, Trump was neurologically impaired and showing signs of diminished cognitive function associated with dementia, don’t you think that as a man he is still showing way better judgment than CROOKED HILLARY would have shown during the time of month when she would be bleeding out of her wherever?

YES

BIGLY YES

BIG LEAGUE YES

AS A DOCTOR I FEEL AN URGE TO POINT OUT THAT AS A 70 YEAR OLD WOMAN HILLARY CLINTON WAS POSTMENOPAUSAL, BUT STILL YES

9) It’s no secret that the media served as sycophantic cheerleaders for everything that Obama did. Now they’re going to blanket the airwaves with left-leaning, biased reports saying that President Trump isn’t mentally fit for office.

THIS ONE IS NOT A QUESTION

10) Were you coerced to give the answers you gave for this REAL and NOT FAKE cognitive exam?

NO


The President appreciates you being a TOP SUPPORTER of our President.

Thank you,

Team Trump

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