I imagine you’ve seen this woman before.
I rarely pay attention to this overexposed spooge-bucket, but I did once
work for the hotel company founded by her great-grandfather. I worked
in the call center that took complaints from people all over the world
about their hotel stays. It was a stressful and depressing job, but it
was occasionally lightened up by “Paris calls” from detractors of Ms.
Hilton who wanted to complain about this helium-brained semen sack
because she happened to be a descendent of the late founder of the
company. I lived for these calls.
Such calls generally went something like this:
Me: How may I help you?
Detractor: I’m not staying in any of your hotels until that bitch shuts up and puts her clothes back on.
Me: Which bitch are you referring to, sir?
Detractor: Who do you think?
Me: My ex-wife?
Detractor: You’re not funny and you know I’m talking about Paris Hilton.
Me: I see. Ms. Hilton does not work for this company.
Detractor: Yeah, but she lives off of it. Her daddy owns it.
Me: No, sir, I believe her father is in the real estate business.
Detractor: The name of the company is ‘Hilton.’ If they don’t own it, who does?
Me: Stockholders. It’s a publicly-traded company.
Detractor: You’re telling me nobody named Hilton works there?
Me: I don’t know of anyone in that family who does.
Detractor: Well, what do you know?
Me: I know we don’t live in the days of the robber barons, when major
companies were sometimes wholly owned by a single person or family. Detractor: You’re not going to get me to believe that she doesn’t
profit off of the company. She sure hasn’t earned that money herself.
Me: I’m not going to argue with that, but she has no connection to the company that I’m aware of.
Detractor: Do you really want me to believe that her family has never had any connection to the company?
Me: No, I didn’t say that. She is the great-granddaughter of the founder.
Detractor: Maybe I should be talking to him.
Me: He died decades ago, sir.
Detractor: I don’t care, and I still think she should put her clothes on and shut her slutty mouth.
Me: Personally, I think the world would be a more interesting place if fewer people wore clothes.
Detractor: You’re a wiseass. Let me speak to your supervisor. Me: Okay. I'll put Miss Hilton on the line.