So...there is this small section of the paper called "Missed Connections", and it's essentially scenerios that bored editors invent to try to titilate and amuse the general public. It's moronic, really, because in order for it to work you have to 1)have people that have already somewhat expressed interest and chose to "pass", 2)have someone who would actually have it occur to them to write the ad and 3)have the exact other person be a person who would read the ad read it on whatever day it gets printed. So, it's a fairly pointless/voyeuristic excercise not actually meant to connect anyone.
One of the ads caught my eye because it was so laughable. It reads like this : "Girl being harassed, you got off at Lawrence Station with the guy who was harassing you hot on your heels. This happened yesterday around 4:30 pm. I am so sorry that I did not intervene and I think you know who this is. I just hope you made it home alright. I kept thinking about you all the way back home and I just want to make sure you made it to your destination safely." Here's the thing...some girl that you are interested in is being HARASSED to the extent that she gets followed off the subway by her harasser...and you do NOTHING except HOPE she gets home okay and now you feel safe enough to ask her for a date? I'm sorry, but if you want to date me and you're not man enough to intervene when it matters, or at least concerned enough to follow after to make sure things don't escalate...how about don't fucking call me ever?? What a pussy!! If she does remember you, douche, she remembers that you did SFA, so snuff out the torch already.
Another torch that should never be lit is the one octo-crazy is carrying for the douchetastic Jon Gosselin. It is unfortunate enough that the DNA of these losers is being carried on by 19 innocents already, the idea of this "missed connection"...gives me goosebumps! How come the really stupid people multiply like rabbits on the Australian outback, and the people we'd like to see more of rarely if ever procreate? You can't leave it all up to Brad and Angelina people!