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July 27, 2012

Invite for B.O. to celebrate our birthdays in the Valley.

This is a national campaign to see if Obama will come to my birthday party. I've already sent the President the following letter.  Still waiting for a response.

Here's the letter I sent him: 


I just found out that your birthday is on August 4th! Guess what? Mine is on the 5th! I always knew we were kindred spirits. We have so much in common. I'm a Democrat; you're a Democrat. You went to law school; I talk about going to law school. People are always hassling you about where you were born; the dude at the liquor store always hassles me about showing my I.D. Seriously, how much Coors Light do I need to buy before this guy believes I'm over 21? Anyhoodles, if you find yourself with nothing to do on your birthday, I'll be celebrating mine on the 4th at The Barrel Sports Bar on Van Nuys. It would be pretty awesome if you joined me. The bar is a total dive, but I'm sure it's WAY better than spending your birthday with the stiffs in Congress or Dr. Oz. The bar has an awesome karaoke DJ that knows how to cold rock a party. There's even shuffleboard and darts just in case the secret servicemen get bored. I'm sure between the both of us we can score at least two birthday Jaeger bombs. If you get too drunk, you can totally crash on my couch. It's a comfy Ikea pullout, and I'll probably have clean towels. Also, my roommate has a kid and she might be interested with going halvsies on a sitter. 

I hope you can make it. I mean, I'm still going to vote for you and stuff, but I'll vote extra hard if you came and showed America that you're the kind of President that isn't afraid throw back a few while watching drunk dudes in Affliction shirts get shut down by girls.

Let me know if you're down, and I'll save you the seat in front of the Megatouch machine.

Rock on!


P.S. The bar is pretty safe because there's always like four LAPD choppers flying around.