Whitey-Tighties and Granny Panties

This forbidden love story has gone on long enough and STW would like to finally set the record straight, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Whitey-Tighties: Hey Granny-Panties…

Granny-Panties: Hey Whitey-Tighties, what’s up?

Whitey-Tighties: Look, I’m not gonna beat around the bush..

Granny-Panties: Whitey-Tighties?!?!

Whitey-Tighties: No. I’m sorry. Wrong choice of words.  Umm I meant to say… Look, I don’t want to rub you the wrong way.

Granny-Panties: Hehe… You aren’t… Literally. I like the way you feel. You’re always so soft and you’re always so supportive.

Whitey-Tighties: Well I’m glad to hear that. It’s who I am I guess. So I know we don’t get to see each-other often and I’m not one to be too clingy, but I like you Granny-Panties. I just want you to know that.

Granny-Panties: That is so comforting.

Whitey-Tighties: I love everything about you. You’re economical, you’re funny, you’re relaxing to be around, and you know who you are. You don’t care about what people think.

Granny-Panties: Wait, wait. Is this what you said to Thong?

Whitey-Tighties: Thong was a mistake. We were drunk, bumped into each other at a bar, we always had this weird type of friendship, and one thing led to another… Believe me, I don’t like it either. I honestly didn’t even know what I was doing the whole time. I kept feeling judged and awkward. She’s not for me, she belongs with Boxer Brief anyways. I want you.

Granny-Panties: And Boy Short?

Whitey-Tighties: Too athletic for me, too demanding. Not my type. Look, I know I’ve made some mistakes and I’m not asking for you to give up everything for me. All I’m asking for is a chance. Let me take you out Sunday night?

Granny-Panties: Hehe, Sunday Night..?

Whitey-Tighties: Hell yes Sunday night! It’s Laundry Night! Everyone’s going.

Granny-Panties: Well where are we gonna go?

Whitey-Tighties: It’s a double sided club. One side is called ‘Washer’, kinda like a wet and wild foam party type thing, pretty sweet. And the other side is called Dryer, more like a chill lounge with a lot of heat lamps. And they have an awesome DJ, DJ Static. He really gets us grinding.

Granny-Panties: Let’s do it! I haven’t done something like this in a really long time.

Whitey-Tighties: This is gonna be the best night ever. You won’t regret this. Ok so I’ll see you Sunday night, I gotta go clean up, I got too excited.

Granny-Panties: Hehe, yeh I can tell.