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Published: July 21, 2011
Description: Writing an introduction letter to someone on an online dating site is hard.

The following is a real introduction letter sent to a woman on a popular online dating site. She mentioned in her profile that you should contact her if you could discuss the differences between leotards and unitards.


Leotards, or as they were originally referred, “Hey you see what that freak show Leo is wearing again? Why does his mom let him go out dressed like that? I heard his father ran away with a trucker or a waitress or a trucker waitress.” have been around since the, well, the time of that weirdo Leo. They have little to no socially redeemable value.

On the other hand a unitard is a highly practical item of clothing that, judging by many future based sci-fi shows, will be all the rage when we are a ruled by a benevolent, fascist dictatorship. Mass adherence to the Atkins diet is the first step on our way to a world united by unitards.

Am I right?


I never got a response.