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July 30, 2016

Making the olympics is a dream come true. Don't ruin all the hard work by not being prepared


Congratulations! If you are receiving this letter that means you have reached an athletic accomplishment that many dream of, but very few accomplish. You are representing the United States of America in the 2016 Olympic Games. Below you will find a list of what to pack for Rio De Janeiro

  • Sports Equipment: This might seem obvious, but we can’t tell you the number of times we’ve had to run to Dick’s Sporting Goods to pick up a javelin last minute.
  • Bugs Spray: It is not the time to care about deet. Get all the deet. Thing should be 100% deet.
  • Comfortable Shoes: Rio is a great city to see on foot. Whether it is the Cristo Redactor, the beautiful beaches or the wonderful nightlife you’re going to want a comfortable pair of shoes to sprint back to the hotel at a moments notice.
  • Condoms: It might seem like the 450,000 condoms provided for the Olympic Village will be enough, but they added golf this year so those things are gonna go quick.
  • Other Countries Uniforms: Little known fact, when your event is over you can sneak onto another country’s team in any sport. In 2012 Gabby Douglas scored a bronze medal in Team Hand Ball for Spain.
  • Toiletries: Make sure to bring your favorite P&G branded toiletries to keep you looking and smelling your best. Whether it is Pantene Pro-V shampoo or Old Spice deodorant, P&G has a product to fit your style. If anyone is caught using any brands besides P&G, you will be locked in a warehouse and forced to watch that sad commercial over and over again. \#ThankYouMom
  • Socks: You need socks. A lot of socks. Throw three more pairs in.
  • Anabolic steroids Power Bars
  • More bugs spray: Seriously, check a bag if you have to.

The United States Olympic Committee