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June 14, 2015
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Wendy has gotten her dream job or so she thinks. Will this dream come to true become a nightmare from hell?! Read and find out!

Writer: Kelly Brotman

Date: 06/14/2015

Wendy Freshner Fall Jobs #5

Job Title: Assistant to Executive Producer of Public Access Television in Westwood, California

Disclaimer: This has nothing related to the Public Access in Los Angeles or Jamba Juice.

Characters:

Wendy Freshner: Wendy feels like she has had hit the big time but little does she know that her boss has some ego issues also she soon discovers that her boss is related to her old boss Fernando Quezno (See first sketch)

‘Rebecca Quezno Tamberine: She is Quezno’s ex wife. Wendy just assumes she is her boss because of her last name.

Carl Tamberine: Wendy’s actual boss. He is Rebecca’s Father.

EXT: Tamberine Public Television Network.

INT: Rebecca’s office (Carl’s Office).

Rebecca Tamberine Quezno is sitting behind Carl’s desk. She is sitting there with her feet on the desk, filing her nails. Wendy rushes in.

Wendy
(Panting) Here is your Wheat Grass drink Mrs. Quezno.

Rebecca
Fresh squeezed?

Wendy
Yes Mrs Quezno, I made sure it was squeezed right in front of me.

Rebecca
Organic? It better be organic.

Wendy
(Stuttering) I-I am not sure. You asked me to get it at Jamba Juice so I was not sure if they used organic or not.

Ashley waves a finger towards to Wendy to indicate she should come forward.

Rebecca
Listen Ms. Freshner my body needs purified highly organic products so that means no commercial products of any kind!

Wendy
(Stuttering) B-but you said you wanted the juice from Jamba Juice.

Rebecca
Yes Jamba Juice on Washington Avenue. They are certainly have organic wheat grass juice.

Wendy
I did not go to the one on Washington Avenue. I went to the one Hollywood Avenue because it was closer to the Fed Ex where you wanted me to make copies of the latest article about Kim Kardashian. It is like you are obsessed with her.

Rebecca
The articles do not matter. You can do them around four but now I need my Organic Wheat Grass Juice!

Wendy
But I spend two freaking hours making copies of Kim Kardashian’s ass I refuse to leave without giving you the copies. Your ex husband was not as crazy as you seem to be.

Rebecca
Let me see the copies.

Wendy hands Rebecca the copies.

Rebecca
And the wheat grass juice.

Wendy hands over the wheat grass juice uneasily. Rebecca waves her finger towards her to indicate that she wants her to come closer, Wendy reluctantly comes forward. Rebecca throws the wheat grass juice in Wendy’s face and then rips ups the photocopies.

Rebecca
You see this. Garbage. I do not want garbage. I want authentic organic juice. I want good copies of Kardashian and it perfect condition. So do it all over again. I do not care if it takes you four fucking hours, I want it done perfectly.

Wendy
(Gulps Audibly) Yes Mrs Quezno….

Carl Temberine enters the scene. A portly middle aged man with glasses and a mustache.

Carl
(Shouting) Rebecca! What the hell are you doing in my office?!

Rebecca stands up quickly.

Rebecca
(Nervously) Hi Daddy….

Wendy
Daddy?!

Carl
(Angrily) What are you doing behind my desk?

Rebecca
Filing my nails and practicing my acting…..

Carl
Not during your office hours young lady, now get to work!

Wendy
(Whines) But Daddy….

Carl
Now…I am not your ex husband who practically worshipped the ground you walked on. Now get busy.

Rebecca
Fine!

Rebecca stomps her way to the door.

Rebecca
One day I will be famous actress and you will see how talented and beautiful I really am! Just you wait for one day my name will be all up in stars! Rebecca Temberine Quezno will be recognized! And when people come up to me and ask who are my parents I will say my father is dead…

Carl slams the door in her face.

Carl
My daughter the airhead. She has seen one too many movies where the blonde airhead gets all the glamour. She does not understand the realities of the real world…

Wendy
Sir…

Carl
That woman drives me crazy. From one hair brain idea to marry some eccentric playboy of a fellow to working for her old man…me! I can not wait until she does something stupid like hiring some half brain to be my assistant.

Wendy
(Laughs nervously) That would be me sir.

Carl
You?! Do you even have the experience to be my assistant?

Wendy
Well your daughter said to be qualified I have to have some connections to Kanye West. I told her that I have a friend whose sister’s boyfriend goes to the same gym as Kanye West.

Carl
And you think that qualifies you to be my assistant?

Wendy
Well according your daughter, yes.

Carl
My assistant has the very best education. The assistant has to have be an ivy league education. Has to know the ins and outs of Tamberine Television Station.

Wendy
Well I always wanted to be a weather girl and I have watched the television programs in this station….

Carl
That is what you think makes you qualified to work as my assistant?! Where are your brains in the gravel out in the street? Listen kid if you want to make it in the business you have to lie your ass off!

Wendy
So I take it this means I did not make your new assistant’s position?

Carl
(Quietly) Get Out…

Wendy
I am sorry…

Carl opens the office door.

Carl
(Yells) I said Get Out now!

Wendy runs to the door. She slowly turns around.

Wendy
(Nervously) Can I at least get a recommendation letter?

Carl slams the door in Wendy’s face. Carl stomps away from the door.

Wendy
(Audible from behind the door) I take that as a no.

Carl
Damn right.

End of Sketch.

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