Los Angeles, California (HAHAJK) — Millions of excited viewers tuned in to watch the Season 2 premiere of AMC’s “The Walking Dead” Sunday. The special effects budget seems markedly increased, as the zombies look scarier and more menacing. Unfortunately, not everyone is happy.
Yasmine Swanson, a spokesman for the Anti-Zombie Defamation League (AZDL) says, that zombies are in an uproar over the way AMC executives portrayed them as mindless stumbling goofs that only crave human flesh.
“They were people once too you know,” she tells HAHAJK. “Zombies deserve the same right and respect as someone who isn’t a zombie, and that is to be represented accurately in television and film.”
Zombies don’t just mindlessly look for the living to eat, Swanson says.
“They are very particular with people they choose to eat. It is usually the weak. Any zombie will tell you that going after a healthy individual is suicide. Even if you are already dead.”
Swanson also laughs at the notion of zombies being able to show anger or have burst of speed while running.
“These people are dead! Hello? I mean seriously. Show me one zombie that doesn’t just stumble around with an expressionless face. They are just hungry , not rage-aholics. They can’t run anywhere or climb things. Muscle atrophy is a very real problem in the zombie world.”
A zombie protest is being held outside the Los Angeles offices of AMC to raise awareness of the misrepresentation of zombies around the world. Swanson says she will wear a protective suit and attend the demonstration because as much as she supports the dead and their rights, she enjoys the world of the living all the same.
HAHAJK was able to talk with some of the zombie demonstrators who were visibly agitated by the way Hollywood makes them look. “Unghhhhh….Growl…..ahhhhhh,” one exclaimed. “ffffft….louhsgphhhhh.” Another zombie woman tore apart an elderly man that had been walking near by to express herself as best she could. “Rights! I have Rights…..aghhhhhhhhh,” she muttered as she chewed.
AMC executives did not respond to the protests verbally, however several shots were fired from high powered rifles and exploded the heads of several demonstrators. Police were on hand to keep the peace but did not make any arrests. “They ARE zombies,” one officer explained. “We don’t want to get bit.”
Swanson said the lack of police involvement was an outrage and that she would be filing a formal complaint with the city.
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