This piece originally ran at Carroll ünd Klinger.

GNST-140: Gender Studies Seminar
Summer 2013, WF 4:45 - 5:45
Professor Tucker Max (

Men’s History
Reclaiming The World From Feminists And Cockblockers

“Don’t blame me for the wound in your crotch.” -- Tucker Max, distinguished author

I am honored to introduce the latest course offering in the O'Brien University Gender Studies Department: Men’s History. For too long, this overlooked and important topic has been excluded from the academy. I hope this course is just the beginning of a revolution, in which we re-introduce the world’s newest minority, men, to a setting that has long ostracized it.

But don’t worry: this won’t be some dry, boring look at old stuff. This course will be a survey of all things man: for the first time ever, we will dive deep into this complex, extraordinary creature.

Course Texts
I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell by Tucker Max
Assholes Finish First by Tucker Max
In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks by Adam Carolla
Tommyland by Tommy Lee
How To Make Love Like A Porn Star by Jenna Jameson


Major Essays: 40%
Final Exam: 25%
Class Hookups: $15
Attitude: 20%
Appearance: 10%
Participation: Whatever


Major Essays
Personal: For this personal essay, please describe when you lost your virginity. Include concrete narrative details like date, location, age, and cup size. I have made this the first assignment so that virgins have the option of dropping the course.
Compare and Contrast: For your second essay, please analyze the pros and cons of using roofies versus natural charm to bed your date. Be sure to weave in your own examples for each side, as well as contact information so that I may verify your stories.
Research: In this final essay, you will use academic research to answer the age-old question, “Are women funny?” If you answer “No,” be sure to include examples of women who are not funny (e.g. Sarah Silverman, Amy Poehler, Tina Fey, etc.). If you answer “Yes,” good luck.

Late Work Policy
If you’re late, you need to take a test. If you pass the test, you need to get an abortion. If you don’t understand this, get out of my classroom.

Course Calendar
Here is the lecture schedule. It is subject to change:


6/5 Class Introduction Icebreakers: Your favorite Tucker Max book??

6/7 A Brief History of Great Accomplishments by Men?

6/12 The Penis Is Mightier?

6/14 Has A Woman Ever Been To Space?

6/19 Film Screening: Boondock Saints

6/21 Fat Chicks: What’s Up With Them??

6/26 How A Tampon Works

6/28 The Holocaust?

7/3 What I Like About Mormonism

7/5 Men Can Be Raped Too?

7/10 Lena Dunham: American Terrorist

7/12 Threesomes (I’ve Had One)?

7/17 Guest lecture by Joseph Francis (creator, Girls Gone Wild)?

7/19 How Young Is Too Young??

7/24 The Philosophy of Entourage?

7/26 When To Pull Out?

7/31 James Franco??

8/2 What Women Do Together In The Bathroom?

8/7 Men’s Rights: Panel Discussion featuring Dane Cook & Fred Durst?

8/9 Final Exam (Open Book)


This piece originally ran at Carroll ünd Klinger.