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April 30, 2017
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Ah yes, the reason for the season, that lovely part of Drag Race where our queens do HiLaRiOuS impersonations of famous celebrities!!!

Hello, kitties! Eureka is gone and we start this ep by mourning her early exit. But not for too long, because this week is…

1. Motha Fucking Snatch Game!!!!!

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Ah yes, the reason for the season, that lovely part of Drag Race where our queens do HiLaRiOuS impersonations of famous celebrities!!!11 Actually, I usually find that only 2 or 3 are funny. And also that only 2 or 3 are actually celebrities. But still, we crave what we know, and Snatch Game is a main-stay. One of the best parts of any SnatchGameEp is when Ru roams the work room and makes the queens pitch her on their routines. Sometimes, it goes like this…

2. Ru Likes It!

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That face! Ru looks like me when I first heard the premise for Get Out. (I mean for real, it’s like a great fucking idea for a movie). In reality, this is Nina telling Mama Ru she’s going to do Jasmine Masters, which is just the kind of snake perfectly eating its own perfect tail that Ru loves. But other times, these work room interrogations don’t go as well, and Ru looks like this…

3. Ru Don’t Like It.

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Here, Ru looks more like she’s watching someone drink mayonnaise, but this is just Sasha doing her Judith Butler impression. I get the shade though…I mean, there’s like SO much funny stuff about first and second wave feminism, but third wave? That’s definitely where Sasha went wrong. Maybe try Margaret Fuller next time, Sash?
The episode gets right into our main event, so let’s dive in and recap all the shelebrities. This week, I’ll be grading them all on the aforementioned criteria of ‘were they funny’ and ‘is this actually a celebrity.’

4. Trinity As Amanda Lepore

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Trinity nails the look, in part because she’s a third of the way there, plastic surgery wise, and she also manages to squeeze in a physical gag or two for a respectable Snatch Game performance.

WAS IT FUNNY: 6/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 5/10

5. Sasha As Marlena Dietrich

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And now, a sentence I didn’t expect to type: Sasha made me straight up LOL as Marlena Dietrich. She got read for having some pretty long wind-ups to her punch lines but 2bh that just made them even funnier to me. Taste is subjective! What an unexpected Snatch Game triumph!

WAS IT FUNNY: 9/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 7/10

6. Aja As Alyssa Edwards

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The look is…fine. The comedy is…………….fine. All around, it’s a disappointing take on Miss Justin, especially since Alyssa Edwards is like the Trump impression of drag queens (everybody’s got one!).

WAS IT FUNNY: 3/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 6/10

7. Nina As Jasmine Masters

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Okay, now HERE is a drag queen I did NOT expect to see impersonated. No T, no shade, no pink lemonade, Nina kills it. She’s got attitude for days and jokes to match. It’s Inside Baseball in all the best ways. Who knew that for Nina to get out of her own way, she just had to impersonate another queen who also didn’t really get out of her own way.

WAS IT FUNNY: 8/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 4/10 but who effing cares she slayed

8. Farrah As GiGi Gorgeous

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I shouldn’t have to know the celebrity to get the joke, but for this one, I didn’t get the joke because there weren’t any jokes. Also, who the hell is GiGi Gorgeous? The internet tells me she’s YouTube famous, but ugh I don’t have time for that! I’ve got a life to live and recaps to write!

WAS IT FUNNY: 0/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 0/10

9. Alexis As Liza Minelli

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Who woulda guessed that Liza Minelli would be an 9th round pick for Snatch Game? I mean we got Big Ang, Tiffany Pollard and the 10th President of the Philippines all before Liza With A Z? Alexis nails it, though I’m not sure she really ELEVATES it, but still…a well-done Liza is a funny Liza.

WAS IT FUNNY: 8/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 9/10

10. Peppermint As Nene Leakes

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Oh no, Peppermint. Oh no oh no oh no, sweet Peppermint. After this and the morning show challenge, it’s clear that we gotta avoid having Peppermint talk to camera. It’s not so much that her impression wasn’t funny as it didn’t even try to be funny? Poor Ru is feeding her lines and ol’ Pep ain’t taking none of the bait. She looks good, sure, yeah, but like…woof. Love you, Pep, but…woof.

WAS IT FUNNY: Negative 3/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 2/10

11. Valentina As Miss Colombia

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When they first cut to Valentina, I made my Get Out face because this is such a great idea for Snatch Game. What a funny gag! And she comes out looking like Nina with that streaked tear. Iconic.

WAS IT FUNNY: 9/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 4/10
BUT IS SHE A MEME SO IN TODAY’S AGE THAT MEANS SHE’S FAMOUS: 10/10

12. Shea As Naomi Campbell

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Shea nails this one too. This now brings the total of ‘Snatch Game Impressions That Have Actually Made Me Laugh’ to five which is a SERIES high. Shea’s Cricket phone joke alone could have won her a Season 7 Snatch Game but this year, the competition is as stiff as me when we see Valentina’s butt later on the runway (SPOILER ALERT!!!!).

WAS IT FUNNY: 8/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 9/10

13. Cynthia As Sofia Vergara

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For being a queen that makes me laugh a lot, in Snatch Game Cynthia sure doesn’t make me laugh a lot. I will say that I think the ESL queens can a hard go of it sometimes, but Sofia Vergara should have been right in Cynthia’s wheelhouse and it just doesn’t connect. Also, a Sofia Vergara with B-cups is surprisingly disconcerting.

WAS IT FUNNY: 2/10
IS SHE A CELEB: 9/10

14. The Runway

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And the comedy hits keep coming with this week’s runway theme: Night of 1000 Madonnas Part Deux. A show that trolls itself! Give it all the Emmys. There were a few good looks, especially Sasha and Shea (who are becoming my favorite runway queens), but the night belonged to…

15. VALENTINA

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Two pieces of cardboard + purse = hysteria at the gay bar I watched this episode in. This is highlight reel worthy! Iconic! Clap Clap Clap Valentina!

Alexis is named our winner, though I would say she only squeaked by Sasha. Nina gets some much deserved love and seems to actually hear it this time, which is a nice turn around.

16. Our Bottom Two

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Ru puts Peppermint and Cynthia in the bottom two. This would have been a great opportunity to Ru to flip the script and throw Farrah in there too for a three queen lip sync, but her Vegas ass gets saved. Pep lights a fucking fire and sends Cynthia packing, but most notably, I think she is the first queen ever to do ‘The Robot’ in a LS4YL and win. So congrats on making history, Pep. Congrats.
That’s it for this week! And then there were nine!

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