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Published March 24, 2008

it seems that my store has an at&t sign over the door or something. everyone is using my store as a phone booth. i can't stand that. someone walks in, i say hello and they promptly turn away from me and hide in the corner behind the stemware. then when an actual customer comes in and asks me a question, the phone-bitch (that's what i call those people, phone-bitches) will stare at me incredulously as i answer said question. if the stare lasts a while i'll turn to the phone-bitch and say politely, "i'm sorry, but this is not a phone booth. there's a public restroom downstairs if you'd like some privacy." then, i smile and ignore them. just moments ago a particularly obnoxious phone-bitch did her best to make me feel bad for interfering with her right to loiter in my store. she told me that this was america and she could do anything she wanted. and i said that's true, if you pay me, or buy something. now, i just want to clarify here. i don't care how long you're in my store if you're actually checking out the merchandise, but if you're standing in the corner for ten minutes talking to your fucking boyfriend about his jealous ex-wife, well, sorry, this is america, and i can kick anyone out of my store i want. so her "clever" solution was to tell me to go and pick out something for her to buy. then she'd be a customer and she could talk on the phone till i finished ringing up her purchase(s). she ended up getting $143.67 worth of premium cigars and 8 new red wine glasses ($50 for 2 sets of 4). she was so pissed. i was about to reneg on the whole deal (yeah, i felt a little guilty, and i figured i'd made my point, no need to press), when she angrily handed me her credit card. i was so shocked i couldn't take it right away so she shook the card at me and snapped that i better take it now or she was just gonna walk out. i could hardly keep from laughing as i swiped her credit card through the machine and watched her money disappear. all so she could exercise her right to talk on the phone wherever she wanted.

...i wish i had the money to be on her side of that dispute...

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