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October 20, 2017
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Residents of a local town are said to be ‘bewildered’ after numerous sightings of a mysterious disappearing vehicle.

Residents of a local town are said to be ‘bewildered’ after numerous sightings of a mysterious disappearing vehicle. The car, which is believed to be a DeLorean DMC-12, has been spotted reaching speeds of around 90 mph before simply vanishing. One witness has been quoted as saying:

I have no idea how he did it, but if he thinks he can get away with speeding by vanishing into thin air, then he’s wrong. I don’t care whether you’re being chased by terrorists or not, a shopping mall car park is for parking, not joyriding.

The earliest known sighting of this phantom car occurred in the year 1885, which is a particularly puzzling revelation, due to the fact that this date precedes the invention of even the most primitive automobile. Additional sightings also occurred in the year 1955, 1985 and 2015. Exactly why the car only seems to exist in years ending with a ‘5’ is a question that has stumped experts.

The registered owner of the vehicle is said to be missing, and is wanted for a series of automobile related misdemeanors that include speeding, illegal vehicle modifications and driving without insurance. The vehicle’s registration document is also said to be out of date, in that it was registered in a year that hasn’t occurred yet.

One local, who wishes to remain anonymous, reached out to our publication with an alarming theory someone has been meddling with history. He claims that the driver of this vehicle is a sordid individual whose sole intention was to engage in relations with the teenage version of his own mother.

Most experts claim that time travel is an impossibility due to the paradoxes associated with it, but could the bond between a mother and her son be strong enough to overcome this impossibility? This source believes so:

I owned a chain of casinos in the eighties and was one of the richest men in the entire western world. However, I was also a loser who cleaned cars for a living. Do you have any idea how confusing it is to have conflicting memories of the same time period?

Reports of individuals disappearing from photographs do appear to support this theory. Additionally, employers have claimed that instances of staff disappearing from existence completely have gone up tenfold in recent times.

More on this twisted story as we get it, unless this publication ceases to exist, or already has.

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