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2Funny
1Die
2,844
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April 05, 2016
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Here's everything to look forward to during the MLB's latest season.

  • Hot dogs at Yankee Stadium for the bargain price of $13.99!
  • Months of excitement followed by an inevitable late-season letdown.
  • Forgetting that baseball even exists during the month of June, remembering again for July and August, forgetting when Football starts, remembering again when playoffs begin.
  • Gambling your lifesavings away based on a “solid hunch.”
  • Donald Trump deporting half of the Cubs.
  • Realizing you’ll never, ever, ever be able to afford Box Seats.
  • Forgetting to take your hat off during the singing of the National Anthem and getting the stink eye.
  • Seriously contemplating suicide after spending 3 hours on StubHub trying to find the perfect seats.
  • Drinking four beers during the first inning and getting the spins during the bottom of the third.
  • Getting super psyched when a batter hits a “home run” that turns out to be a pop fly.
  • Making it through a stadium parking lot and feeling like you survived the Red Wedding on “Game of Thrones.”
  • Stadium minimum three-hour long lines to pee.
  • Wondering what the hell you’re doing with your life after spending 4 hours in front of your TV on a beautiful Sunday afternoon watching your team lose.
  • Singing “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” for the 1,000th time like you fucking mean it.

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