Celebrities See All

Close

Quick Links

or
0 Funny Votes
0 Die Votes
245 Views
Published July 05, 2009
"Seriously, Cindy... WTF?!?! ... It didn't take this many weeks to sort shit out when the friggin Pope died!!"

(Future quote, once I am no longer house sitting... Names have been changed to protect those who will kick my ass for this comment when they return.)

So yeah... I'm still house sitting..........

They left before Memorial day... are still gone at the 4th of July... and have no definite plans for returning....

................

WTF?!?!?!

I mean, yes... It wasn't a vacation... bad things happened.... I get it....

.... There has been some misfortune during the stay... hey, I understand... Murphy and his God forsaken Law bend me over the wood pile weekly, and never buy me dinner afterwards... I know...

But seriously... What the ever loving, holy Halliburton, Jesus hopped up on a Giant Pixie Stick fuck!!! This is getting r-tarded!!!

I mean, don't get me wrong... I enjoy the dog's company (almost as good as the 12 gauge I used to sleep with).... The birds are cool.... except when they feel the need to go on their 3AM, 3 hour, "Chirp-Fest's"..... Hell... I even enjoy the fish pond from time to time.... mostly when I haven't spent an hour "Elbow-Deep in fish leavings"..... God-Darn that friggin filter....

I mean... seriously... Can anybody reading this tell me they have a friend that could leave their home for 6+ weeks, and baby-sit your domecile? Huh???? Can you?!?!?!

Honestly... My cat won't know who the bloody hell I am when I come back.... assuming the folks watching my place didn't just let him roam free, and say "Feck-It"....

And, I haven't spent time there in 6 weeks.... why am I paying an Electric Bill!!!!!!!

So, here is the contest.... What would your first words be to the lovely couple, when they return home after all this time? The winner, judged by me, gets a cookie.... Deliverable the next time I am in their geographic area. :-)

Ok..... I'm just a tad stressed right now... as I'm spending vital time tending to this home, when I could be getting my own "sitch" settled, and get the Holy Hartford out of this dessicating state we call Michigan....

But no....

I gotta go buy Parakeet seed.....

Speaking of which... I gotta end this blog... because the dog wants to go outside again... and find another skunk to play with. :-/

"I'm not usually a praying man..... and I know you're busy... but if you can find the time, and find it in your heart.... Please.... SAVE ME SUPERMAN!!!!!"

- Kenny G.
Advertisement
Advertisement

From Around the Web

More