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April 25, 2011

Federales recovered a corpse on the street that was, "No question. That was Batman."

Federales recovered a corpse on the street that was, "No question.  That was Batman."

Sergeant Rafeal Marquez continued, "At first, we couldn't tell what we were looking at, because of his black outfit, you know?  We were able to fight off the cartel just long enough to collect his body."

An eye witness reported that a man in a black suit had "without fear" walked out into the middle of a gunfight and started throwing "bat" ninja stars at the heavily armed cartel members.  He had time to throw two ninja stars, both missing by a mile, before he was shot in the face and chest.

A story came out the same day that the Lopez family, of Southern Juarez, had bought a batman spotlight.  Juan Lopez reported that "The light had finally come in.  We used it for the first time last night.  I thought it was going to changed the war, you know?"

--Related news--Lopez family slaughtered.  The Cartel issued a statement, "Yeah, we did it, man.  Nobody calls Batman on us.  That's not cool."