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August 06, 2008


Things I learned from my dog....

~I need to be more selective about where I go to the bathroom.  Even if it takes all day.

~If my husband isn't paying attention to me I should pace around the room, look at him and sigh to mark each lap.

~You do NOT want that guy on your lawn!

~Or that guy...

~Chasing squirrels is an intelligent way to spend an afternoon.

~I haven't successfully quenched my thirst unless there is water EVERYWHERE!

~You can digest just about anything as long as you really want it.

~You can't ignore me if I get RIGHT in your face.

~ Being loud gets things done.

~Never take your eye off the ball, it could be a trick.

~Never trust a guy with a mustache.

~If you have no food, all you need to do is scratch the bottom of your bowl a few thousand times and PRESTO.

~If you really love something, you need to hide it.  Preferably under the couch cushions.

~If my husband won't get out of bed, I just need to pee on him.

And finally...

~Only shit in the car if you are stuck in traffic.