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August 06, 2008
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Things I learned from watching E!.....

~If you need to "reinvent" yourself, your career was a failure...move on!

~If you don't warrant publicity, go commando!

~If you allow cameras to tape your life...you have no talent and should go commando.

~If your life/career seems out of control...become a lesbian.

~If your dad never gave you the attention you craved...adopt a LOT of kids.

~If you do steal adopt lots of kids, name them really weird awesome names like Copper Roof or Monaco.

~Just because he's gay does not mean he knows what you should wear.

~If your marriage is in question, get pregnant.  That'll shut 'em up!

~If all else fails, there's always your sex tape with Verne Troyer....

 

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