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June 25, 2009


Over the last few years I have repeatedly engaged in an activity that is threatening to tear apart my marriage and ruin my relationship whith my children.  It's an inheritated disorder that I remember my father doing a lot when I was child.  I've tried to stop, but the desire to keep doing it is undeniable.  If anyone has any advice, please let me know.  Here's my problem:

Any time my kids, ages 3 and 6, use words like iPod, I immediately say, "I don't think I even knew what an iPod was when I was your age."   It also happens with words like cell phone, wifi, internet, flat screen, microwave (really, I didn't know what that was until I was like 10) and a few dozen others.

Sure, the first few times it was amusing, but around the fifth or sixth time it becomes tired and worn out.  By now I must have used the same shitty joke a few thousand times.  Joke overusage is a problem that many people in my family, particularly males seem to suffer from.  I want to stop, I try to stop, but it always pops out, "I don't think I knew what a wireless infared mouse was when I was you age."

Sometimes, I try not to say something right at the moment, so the sentence just sits there in my head, needling at me, screaming for its release.  So, two hours later, I end up saying, "I don't think I knew what a wii remote was when I was your age," which ends up getting me weird looks from the rest of the mental health treatment team (not a group you want to look crazy in front of).

I know it's not funny and not just because no one laughs, but there's something in the sighs, eye rolls and general annoyance displayed by my wife and kids that I like and just makes me want to do it again.  How do I stop so I don't end up like so many other pathetic, one joke fathers?