As you no doubt know, Keurig coffee machines, which use individual-sized plastic brewing cups (known as “K-Cups”) to make coffee, have become all but ubiquitous in offices and homes across America. Not only does this system create a huge amount of unnecessary waste, it’s also incredibly uneconomical, with Keurig users ultimately paying upward of $60 a pound for coffee — sixty goddamn dollars a pound.

Some of the very best coffee in the world costs $60 a pound. Keurig coffee is not that.

So, it’s probably time for a symbolic protest of this kind of complete bullshit, right? To that end,FUNNY OR DIE WANTS YOUR USED K-CUPS; WE ARE ABSOLUTELY SERIOUS ABOUT THIS — please, scour your office and your home and your garbage cans and mail ALL of your spent coffee pods to this address (and please rinse them, if at all possible):

FUNNY OR DIE
P.O. BOX 20176
GREELEY SQUARE STATION
4 EAST 27th STREET
NEW YORK, NY 10001-9998

“Why?” you’re probably asking. Well, shut up and listen, stupid. It’s so we can glue them together and construct a life-size sculpture of a huge motherfucking polar bear (or an orca, if we get enough) and then auction the sculpture on Ebay, of course! Then, whatever money we make from the auction of the sculpture, we will donate to Cool Earth, an organization that works with indigenous tribes to stop the destruction of the most at-risk rainforests.

Polar_Bear_ANWR_9.jpg

Maybe a sculpture like this guy? Pretty good pose.

Renowned fine artist Ben Grasso will be overseeing the construction of this sculpture, so it will be real good. He makes ice sculptures sometimes, too.

Yes, this is a super ham-handed and overwrought piece of agitprop, and very much like a dumb undergrad art student project, but we’re still doing it.

SO C'MON, SEND US YOUR K-CUPS, YOU TURKEYS. WE’RE MAKING A VERY BROAD SATIRICAL STATEMENT HERE.

This article will be updated as the project progresses.

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