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March 21, 2016
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Apple announced an updated version of the iPhone. Here are some new features to look forward to.

Apple announced an updated version of the iPhone today. Here are some new features to look forward to.

  • Ultra-high resolution camera designed specifically for dick pics.
  • Additional bottom facing camera for dick pics.
  • High intensity flash designed to evenly illuminate your dick.
  • Secondary flash designed for balls.
  • Separate designated folder for dick pics.
  • New photo editing application that enables you tweak the size/girth/color of your dick.
  • Easier access to dick pic applications like Snapchat and iMessage.
  • Specially curated Apple Music playlists for dick pic photoshoots.
  • Enhanced Voice Memo application, designed specifically to pick up sound-waves of your dick.
  • Weather application now includes temperature of your dick.
  • Notes application outfitted with special graph for logging the size of your dick on different days.
  • Siri now loaded with hundreds of dick pic-taking tips.
  • Apple Maps now pinpoints exact location of your dick.
  • Two words: dick Emojis.
  • Longer battery life.
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