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Published August 11, 2009

Is it normal to go out to the street to get into your car and when its not where you remembered parking it you immediately think it's been stolen? Or how about when you go to make a sandwich at work on your lunch break and your peanut butter seems to be at a lower level than you recall and you think who the Frick had the nerve to eat my peanut butter? Or maybe when you've just done laundry and you wind up with a missing pair to a sock and you think, how in the hell did you not see that person open up your machine and grab a sock, I mean you were right there listening to your ipod..... You weren't jamming out with you eyes closed again where you? Jesus after last time when it was smart wool you swore you'd catch that scumbag! You even made a play list called "Songs that I won't jam out to, thus not closing my eyes which would allow some jerk off to steal yet another single sock, rendering its mate alone and useless!". Wait did you put "My Heart Will Go On" in there? Yeah. Sure. Over a decade ago, when that masterpiece came out, you hated it, but now you're older and understand a woman's heart... you can't resist shutting out the Laundromat around you to better picture the imagery of those lyrics.... and do you know how long that song is? You're lucky you have any matching socks at all!

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