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Published December 13, 2011 More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
The Cardinals
  • As we all know in this day an age you can get laid anytime or anywhere at a drop of a hat, But what if you want to stay a virgin untill the "right one comes a long." Well this is how we do it. On friday nights just by staying in  to watch wrestling would be a good start. Also living with your parents your whole life with no plans on moving out anytime soon for the fact is you don't have any friends to stay with helps out a lot. So if thats not stoping you the fact that you have no job or car should put you over on staying a virgin for life. When that doesn't work i think its time to get clean and off the drugs that make you want to bang like X , E and LSD. Once you do that you should be well on you way to never getting action ever agian or even having a change to get with  some fine ass lookin person. So you say i did all that but it's just not working out because junkie bitches still want up on my nuts. Well i got the trick to keep these tricks off your nuts, & that is to beat off ever 5 minutes to a Christen O' Donnell pic or clip and then you will turly never get laid agian.

P.S if these tricks do not work just show them your limp d*ck & ladies just don't clean up your lady parts and you will not be getting anything for a very long time tust me on that ;-) at least until you meet the right one that is. But am just a Priest so how would i even know.

just KEEP iT iN Your Pants! For the love of god!

Father Jacob loves you all

 i'll be seeing you in Church right?

O by the way staying to drunk to f*ck is a classic way to go about it as well.