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Published April 02, 2011

The Duke's Boner Kills

(No particular order)

1. "This was my ex-boyfriend's favorite dildo"

2. 40 mg of Lexipro

3. Facial hair

4. Theresa Daniels

5. Cankles

6. Patchouli oil

7. Brunch

8. "Stop looking at me cat"

9. Shit on the tip

10. Whiskey and Cocaine

11. Back hair

12. Visible Herpes

13. Edward James Olmos' face

14. Toilet paper in the ass

15. Tramp stamps

16. Black ex-boyfriends

17. Dick Tattoos

18. Having to shit during sex

19. Delaware

20. Looking like my ugly sister

21. Dry pussy

22. Appalachian folk music

23. "I'm pregnant"

24. "My friend is coming to town next week. You'll really like him."

25. A dick in my mouth

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