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August 13, 2009


only...you stop checking your e-mail every thirty seconds for some kind of response, even checking your secret, solely-for-the-purpose-of-making-others-bloggers-cry e-mail in hopes that they have read your veiled pain and are now ready to come back to you. Here's the thing about having someone leave you...THEY LEFT...so what do we have to cry about? Good riddance! It's obviously their own problem and if they are not where they want to be, why would you want them to be there? I'm a mother, so I can say this with absolute authority, the answer to that question is simply "BECAUSE I SAID SO! THAT's WHY!!!" I recently had to get over someone, and it bothered me so much when other people (like my Bitch friends), would say "You're obviously not over him yet." And, I really thought they were just being fags about the whole thing...but they were right...and they're still Bitches. I have come to realize that you are never truly over someone until you stop being on their side, and that may sound hostile, but until you stop agreeing with someone about what wasn't right about you and take a moment to remember all the crap things about them that you looked the other way on, you're not over them. Like, the time you kissed them even though they had a faint, slim white bogey hanging from their nose or the way you gave them back a back rub even when they had a ferocious case of back-ne on their shoulder or, ugh, the day BEFORE you gifted them a bottle of Head and Shoulders Shampoo...we got over it and didn't even bat an eye, so why does everything he may or may not appreciate about you become the focus of the investigation? Being a fucking woman, I immediately assume that I'm too fat, not pretty enough or that there's something just not sexy enough about me that would make him look somewhere else, and of course the bitch friends always chime in that I'm too good for him which only seems to confirm for some reason my assertion that I am a waste of space and should be grateful for him ever giving me the time of day. A word to all women of the world who think they are being friends, insincere flattery  only sounds good coming from men.  If men are slathering on the juice it means they want to bone us and that's a good thing. If the flattery comes from another woman that means they are trying to prop us up from something, most likely a really uncomplimentary truth, so it doesn't work as well. 
ANYWAY, the point to my rant is that I REALLY do feel better.  I have some distance and no desire to turn back.  He's a douche and I'm a diva...Life goes on :)