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Published: November 23, 2010
Description: The side effects of the new TSA regulations.

“I haven’t been touched like that in ages,” Rose whispered to Stella after the mandatory TSA pat down.

“Hell I aint been touched period, in… well I guess its been almost 20 years.” sighed Stella.

The dormant oxytocin released into their systems as a result of human contact now produced a flush and rush of feelings and emotions.

“I need a fucking cigarette,” declared Stella standing up.

“Oh Stella, there aint a cigarette around here for twenty miles.”

“Bullshit!” Stella blurted. “I saw a smoking room next to that bar. Come on Rose, lets go get a drink.”

And the two of them tottered off in search of a Pall Mall and a proper Tom Collins.

Later that evening someone got a phone call. It seems that grandma had broke her hip, falling off of a bar.