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May 06, 2010


Is there a common procedure for opening a newly bought item in tough to open plastic packaging? Let's say you stop at the store and purchase a cell phone car charger, once you return to your car you want to open it immediately, but it's tough as shit to do. Here are the steps that I try over and over with no success:
Step 1: Try tearing plastic with hands
Step 2: Try tearing plastic with teeth
Step 3: Try stabbing plastic with keys
Step 4: Try stabbing plastic with a pen
Step 5: Try tearing plastic with hands again, become pissed off
Step 6: Contemplate burning it with a lighter but remember the last time you smelt burnt plastic and how long it takes for the smell to go away (I'm pretty sure only hair smells worse when burnt.)
Step 7: Say "fuck it, i'll wait till i get home and use the god damn scissors."