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To: mikescollins@yahoo.com
From: HR@funnyordie.com
Subject: Funny or Die email

Hi Mike!

Welcome to Funny Or Die! Dan asked me to set you up with an FOD email. Any preference?

Ruth Becky
Human Resources, Funny Or Die


To: HR@funnyordie.com
From: mikescollins@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

Hi Ruth! Nice to meet you. Can I please have mikescollins69@funnyordie.com? Assuming it’s not already taken?

Thanks!

Mike Scollins


To: mikescollins@yahoo.com
From: HR@funnyordie.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

Hi Mike – Um, no, that’s definitely not taken. But we actually have mikescollins@funnyordie.com available? Would you rather that?

Ruth Becky
Human Resources, Funny Or Die


To: HR@funnyordie.com
From: mikescollins@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

Hi Ruth! I wasn’t picking mikescollins69 because I thought you had 68 other MikeScollins-es at Funny Or Die. That’d be insane. 69 is a reference to a sex position I love. Let’s stick with that.

Thanks so much! Have a great weekend!!

Mike Scollins


To: mikescollins@yahoo.com
From: HR@funnyordie.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

Mike– Could I suggest mikes@funnyordie.com or mscollins@funnyordie.com?

Additionally, I’m worried about you telling me to have a good weekend since it’s Tuesday. Please respond.


To: HR@funnyordie.com
From: mikescollins@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

Hey Ruth – My only issue with those suggestions is they don’t have a reference to simultaneous oral sex. If you could add 69 to either of them, they work great though.

Also, I could have sworn in my interview Dan mentioned Summer Tuesdays? I hope I didn’t mishear him because I’m going to Montauk tonight.


To: mikescollins@yahoo.com
From: HR@funnyordie.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

You definitely misheard about Summer Tuesdays. Please don’t go to Montauk tonight. And I’m afraid I need to put my foot down on erotic company emails.

Funny Or Die emails are just the employee’s name @funnyordie.com.


To: HR@funnyordie.com
From: mikescollins@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

Oh so your name is “HR” then? I thought it was Ruth. LOL.

Seriously though, I know you’re trying to help but I got hired here as a comedy writer.Please trust me that this is very funny.


To: mikescollins@yahoo.com
From: HR@funnyordie.com
Subject: Re: Funny or Die email

My issue is not with it being funny or not. My issue is with the appropriateness of the implied sexual activity.


To: HR@funnyordie.com
From: mikescollins69@gmail.com
Subject: AUTOREPLY – OUT OF OFFICE RE: Funny or Die email

Hi.Thank you for your email. I am away from the office and will be in Montauk until Monday. If this is an emergency please email danielabramson@funnyordie.com

Best,
Mike Scollins


To: danielabramson@funnyordie.com
From: HR@funnyordie.com
Subject: NEW EMPLOYEE MIKE SCOLLINS

Hi Dan,

I’m afraid your new employee Mike Scollins is demanding his FOD email be mikescollins69@funnyordie.com.Please weigh in.

Ruth


To: HR@funnyordie.com
From: danielabramson@funnyordie.com
Subject: Re: NEW EMPLOYEE MIKE SCOLLINS

That is fucking hysterical, Ruth!! It’s like his name but also a reference to mouth stuff! While I have you, please change my email to danielabramson69@funnyordie.com

Thanks so much!

- sent from my Motorola flip phone-


To: danielabramson@funnyordie.com
From: HR@funnyordie.com
Subject: Re: NEW EMPLOYEE MIKE SCOLLINS

I’m not doing that.


To: HR@funnyordie.com
From:danielabramson@funnyordie.com
Subject: AUTOREPLY – OUT OF OFFICE Re: NEW EMPLOYEE MIKE SCOLLINS

Thank you for your email. I am out of the office in Mantauk with my new best friend,Mike Scollins. I will respond to your email on Monday. If this is an emergency please email HR@funnyordie.com

Dan Abramson

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