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December 07, 2015
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I'm in hell. I hate what Ice Cube is doing to my hair, but I'm too intimidated to stop him.

I’m currently getting my hair cut by O'Shea Jackson aka Ice Cube and he’s really fucking it up. I look so dumb, but I can’t tell him that I don’t like it because he’s too scary. He raps about killing people and seems to have a short fuse from what I’ve seen in his films (Barbershop, Barbershop 2: Back Two Business, Anaconda, Boyz N the Hood, Dangerous Ground, Friday etc). Here, just look what happens when you Google “mean Ice Cube.”

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Like, come on! This dude is a certified OG. A true BAMF. I couldn’t possibly ask him to stop cutting my hair

He’s a real tough dude and I’m afraid he will put me in the ground if I tell him he is messing my flow up. This sucks because I’m such a big fan! I’ve seen so many of his movies like Next Friday, Barbershop: The Next Cut, Friday After Next, xXx: State of the Union, Ride Along, Ghosts of Mars etc. So when I got the chance to get my hair cut from the one and only crazy a** motherf*cker of Compton California, you know I jumped on the opportunity! How was I supposed to know he is horrible at cutting hair? Now he is in the middle of making me look like a lesbian Criss Angel, but I’m not going to stop him. I’ve seen what he can do to people from his performances in Trespass, The Glass Shield, 22 Jump Street, The Players Club, Three Kings, All About the Benjamins, Torque etc.

Ugh. He keeps asking if it’s “good” and I just keep lying though my teeth. It’s as if he wants me to say something negative about his work so he has an excuse to get some action.

Whatever, I guess this has been a cool experience, even though I now have the lamest trim on the block. At least I can say I got it from Ice Cube, the guy in Are We There Yet?, 21 Jump Street, The Janky Promoters, The Longshots and Are We Done Yet?

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